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High Maintenance Women & What to Do with Them

10/06/2006
By

Nothing..

Do Absolutely Nothing with them..

As a matter of fact wipe the old slate completely clean..

Let me explain..

I recently reviewed some various material that was meant to help men overcome the various types of resistance that Western Women use.  Resistance that is inevitably put up when any Man wants to ask a Woman he is attracted to out for a date..

The advice ranged from things like spinning her own resistance against her.. to painting a subconscious picture in her mind that you were going to be the “ultimate boyfriend”.  It was all an interesting read but essentially it was like reading Sun Tzu’s – Art of War..  And if you’ve ever read this book most of the battlefield strategies are based on some form of DECEPTION. 

Her side puts up an impenetrable defense.. the Man’s side put’s up a decoy.. draws her attention away with some funny comment and then blitzkriegs by keeping her emotionally off-balanced and insecure..  Her side enacts counter-measures..  the Man’s side erects counter-counter measures.. and round and round it goes..

So I was thinking to myself..

  • Is this what modern relationships have de-evolved into?
  • Is dating and courtship really supposed to be a Psychological “Battle”
  • Was this the way Mother Nature intended it to be?

Now I want to give the guys who wrote this stuff credit.. because in some ways it’s ingenious and probably a necessary approach.. 

…if you are dealing with Western Women..

But when it comes to Russian Women you DON’T have to play these games..

It’s MUCH more straight up with these ladies. They are looking for a serious relationship and if you are a decent considerate man and you show it to them they will respond very positively.

Now even if she is not the girl for you at the very least you will be shown deep appreciation and respect for any sincere attempt to reach her because this is completely flattering to her.

This is EXACTLY why I’m advocating to Guys to stop wasting their time by trying to “out-psych” any woman from their homeland.

Quite frankly it’s a mess and a real waste of time and effort if you are truly looking out for the BIG PICTURE.   Don’t get me wrong I totally appreciate the effort and motivation that goes into studying this subject..

But a Man over here simply would never think that deeply into it because he doesn’t have to..

I’m sure I will be writing more about this in detail in the future.. because it seems like more and more Men are trying to “arm themselves” with these “strategies” and “counter-measures”.   Admittedly, years ago when I lived in the States I was just as eager to dive into this stuff as well and you can read more about these experiences here

So believe me when I tell you these things.. 

Because way back when I’ve probably studied every pickup book and technique out there in order to better my own “game”. 

With this in mind..  

PLEASE DON’T come to Russia with these “pickup programs” pre-loaded in your head because it’s going to be very counter-productive to say the least…

Nope.. take that old buggy operating system you’ve been using and completely RE-FORMAT that Hard Drive.

Because when you arrive you are going to be stepping into a completely different and more traditional world and you DON’T want to be in the wrong frame of mind. 

I know that there may be a strong impulse on any Man’s part to engage in this because of the negative experiences he’s had with the Women back home. 

But unfortunately it may COMPLETELY taint the way he looks upon the women over here..  and that would be a real shame.. because I’ve personally seen a number of Men totally screw up their chances towards creating real relationships because they’ve had some silly “battlefield” dating programs playing in their heads.

I understand that these programs may not seem so silly in the US or the West.  Because in that environment it seems like a Man needs to be an Expert Car Mechanic just to drive any ordinary car down the street!  

That’s how high maintence.. or completely broken down.. many of these Western Women are. 

While here in Russia it’s just the opposite.. it’s more like get in the “car” insert your key and drive.. and believe me guys…  it’s will probably be the greatest “driving experience” you’ll ever have.

Honesty, Sincerity and being a traditional Gentleman are your best friends here.

These Manly traits are VERY Precious Commodities in Russia…  

And the more you cultivate them in-order to demonstrate your own true confidence and charm.. the more you will gain..

So the next time any of you walk into a Barnes & Nobel or Borders and see some Guy browsing through the Dating or Divorce Section..

Could you maybe do him a BIG favor and pass him my URL?

Thanks..

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61 Responses to High Maintenance Women & What to Do with Them

  1. Harvey on 10/06/2006 at 3:17 pm

    (1) Why does the PUA stuff work on western women but not on Russian women? Because if the PUA is designed to ‘decode’ female psychology then shouldn’t it work everywhere?

    (2) You mentioned that you have seen a number of guys fail in Russia because they were using PUA stuff. How specifically did the PUA stuff hinder them?

  2. Taras on 10/06/2006 at 3:28 pm

    I agree, it’s best not to bother with high maintenance women. Doins so saves a lot of time, aggravation and effort that would be wasted anyway.

    Taras

  3. WK on 10/06/2006 at 5:57 pm

    As I’ve always said… They’re someone else’s problems…

  4. Rule62 on 10/06/2006 at 6:24 pm

    This is completely accurate RW.

    Harvey, the pick up stuff works in the States and other western countries, it does. But my experience is that Russian women and women in general from the FSU (Ukraine, et al) are almost like a different species.

    The absolute hardest thing for me to do in courting my fiancee was to drop all this nonsense. And I was never into in the first place. so you would think I would be anxious to drop it. But I was so programmed after 20 years that it came naturally. My biggest friend in this? Watching movies from the 1950s, 40s and 30s.

    I had to re learn how to be a man in a relationship. I actually tried a few things initially, and it backfired big time!!!

    These are strong women with a strong sense of self and what is right and what is wrong.

    I started off with this “I’m an American, with a big bank roll, and these chicks will be all over me because I am a meal ticket”. WRONG! That attitude never came naturally to me anyway, so with a little education I changed to what came naturally.

    When I tried it, I was told to hit the bricks real fast every time – and I mean every time.

    So, here is what I learned – courtship in the sense that it was meant the last 2,500 years is fun! Let me restate that – it is fun!

    If you have not already done so, try it in these countries and see what happens. Be a decent, honest, sincere man that can treat a woman like a woman. I am telling you that you will have runway model quality women all over you. And they will treat you like a man, with respect and adoration.

    Can you beat that? Is there anything better?

  5. Joe on 10/06/2006 at 6:50 pm

    Harvey,

    Some of the pick up strategies used in the West would be considered rude or offensive to women in Russia. Especially, behavior that would be considered ungentlemanly. Such as the whole “Jerk” strategy or speed seduction techniques.

    The techniques for success in Russia is just be yourself. Be a gentleman and attentive. A great conversationalist helps too.

    They value male strength, both physical and emotional. Too much physical strength and you are a bully. Too much emotional and you are weak and timid. You have to find that fine balance. Along with proper manners, education (being intelligent and open minded) and confidence will make you the ideal future husband. Can you find this in modern seduction, pick up or self help books???

  6. rw_man on 10/06/2006 at 7:02 pm

    Harvey,

    Rule62 and Joe totally nailed what I’m saying because they have both already experienced what I’m talking about first hand.

    You will find that being a helpful, strong, sincere gentleman comes MUCH MORE Naturally then to be a player.. Don’t over analyze this my man..

    As Obi-Wan once said to Luke..

    “Trust your instincts Luke..”
    “Use the Force Luke..”

    Same deal.. this will come much more naturally if you unplug from any of the Pickup Stuff that’s out there. So unplug now and go watch a John Wayne or Carey Grant Movie instead..

  7. Joe on 10/06/2006 at 10:48 pm

    I agree with watching old movies as an inspiration. Especially the screwball romantic comedies of the 1930s. Where the women are feminine and guys are real guys. These are not ‘chick flicks’. Great dialogue. Boundries are clearly defined. Great acting too.

    Besides movies, start reading hero-based literature. Start with Ernest Hemmingway. I would recommend The Sun Also Rises, Death In the Afternoon and a collection of short stories called Men Without Women. The short story The Snows of Kilimanjaro is a warning for all men not to lead a life through adopting a woman’s point of view as your own. Why do you think the feminists hate Papa???

  8. Joe on 10/06/2006 at 10:49 pm

    Sorry, I meant to spell Hemingway. It slipped.

  9. James on 10/06/2006 at 11:47 pm

    Thanks for the advice. I’ve started sending messages on IMA dating. Its much easier when I know that I can just be myself – especially online where I can’t read body language.

  10. Patricia C. Deyton-Knox on 10/06/2006 at 11:51 pm

    My sincerest thanks for encouraging your ilk to head off to Russia. In doing so, you are doing the womenfolk of this country a wonderful service, and for that you have my gratitude.

  11. QuietRebel on 10/07/2006 at 3:01 am

    Wow! Great posts and advices. It’s really great to know that there are women in this planet that really appreciate honest and sincere gentlemen like myself.

    I always grew up to be a gentleman because of my family teaching me old school etiquette and family values. I grew up really appreciate those qualitities so much.

    I eventually managed to stay away from the whole crazy college scene where alcohol and sex are so rampant during my undergraduate college years. I knew that I missed nothing at all.

    Honestly, I really never buy any of those seduction and pick up games. Just that they seem to be so superficial and seeing how people really are around myself. I was like why play games and trying to manipulate other people? I really hate those superficial stuff. Personally, I value honesty, trust and wonderful friendship in relationships so much.

    Why buy all of those craps when I can be just myself and being who I am? I am always being a honest and straightforward guy doing what feels right for myself. If other people don’t like me for being who I am, my answer for them: “too bad, it’s their problem, not mine! I’m just being who I am, and stop trying to tell me what I should be!” I really despise all of those stupid games so much. They hurt people in the long term.

    It’s really great to know that Russian women value honesty and sincere and despise superficial games unlike here in the USA. More reasons for visiting Russia!

  12. LL on 10/07/2006 at 5:22 am

    Great advice Rule and Joe! And another excellent post RW! I love this blog. Keep up the great work!

    -LL

  13. vper1 on 10/07/2006 at 5:55 am

    Patricia,

    Why do you perpetuate what your blog so eloquently manifests to be the antithesis of: “cacophonous vociferation and rodomontade”?

  14. rw_man on 10/07/2006 at 6:09 am

    Hello Patricia C. Deyton-Knox,

    I took the liberty of checking out your blog to find out more about what kind of bomb thrower you are.. So I paid you a visit..

    http://sagejournal.blogspot.com/

    and then I looked up your profile..

    http://www.blogger.com/profile/30610213

    Patricia it looks like I must have hit a raw nerve with you. The way you portray yourself only confirms my suspicions about your childhood.

    Normally I would respect that and let it rest.. but if you want to showcase your venom in my house.. Well then it looks like I will need to make an example out of you for all to see… and hopefully to learn..

    And unfortunately this will be at your expense..

    Patricia, I could not have found a better case study if I tried to back up what I wrote on

    “The Dirty Little Secret Behind Feminism”.

    http://russianwomentruth.com/2006/09/23/the-dirty-little-secret-behind-feminism/

    And on some level of awareness I actually believe you WANT to be this case example or else you wouldn’t have paid us the visit that you have.

    So I will grant you your wish and use your own words to illustrate this..

    ===============From your blog=================

    “My Feminist Upbringing – I hardly ever knew my mother. She died giving birth to my witless brother when I was a little girl”

    “Understandably, Daddy felt terrible guilt for having killed my mother by implanting her with his pernicious spawn. One way in which he atoned was by bringing me up in much the same way that my dear mother would have wanted, or–more accurately, I suspect–by attempting to mould me in my mother’s own lovely image. As you may have guessed, my dear departed mother was a liberal feminist.”

    “When all the other girls in pre-school were sitting down to tea-parties with their Cabbage Patch dollies, I was accompanying Daddy in his study. On a typical evening, he would light his pipe, pour himself a glass of fine port or sherry (I’d get a taste–but only a taste!) and choose a book for us to read together in front of the hearth-fire. We devoured all the classics, of course, but Daddy took especial care to acquaint me with the works of the feminist stalwarts: de Beauvoir, Friedan, MacKinnon; Dworkin, Hirshman, Greer.

    The legacy of my feminist upbringing is mixed, I must admit. Like many vital, comely young women (though I be modest, it is silly to deny that which is true!), I oft find myself torn between, on the one hand, my intellectual awareness of the Patriarchy, and my loathing of it; and on the other, my natural admiration for the male sex.

    “Daddy, are you a part of the Patriarchy?” I used to ask, my blue eyes wide with a kind of horror-struck awe.

    “Of course I am, Patsy darling,” he would answer. His slender fingers would smooth the tips of his elegant red moustache–a sign of nervousness or deep thought. “I am a man, after all.”

    “So if I love you, does it mean I love my oppressor?”

    “Daddy never knew quite how to answer that. I’m still not entirely sure whether it was because he didn’t know the answer, or because he didn’t wish to hurt my feelings.

    It was a child’s foolish question. As everyone knows, there exists a crevasse of sorts between the persnickety minutiae of theory and the multifarious demands of day-to-day existence. Nevertheless, the essential paradox of that question is one that has continued to plague me throughout my adolescence and on into my adult life.

    And it is one that positively tormented me in the summer of 2003, when I first met my husband, Bertrand.”

    ============ From your Profile – About========================
    Age: 25

    My father is a Marxist and my mother was a radical feminist, but I am a classical liberal.

    I have come across few men who do not find me irresistably attractive. And I have come across fewer still who are worth a minute of my time.

    I can drink more cognac than any man I know.

    I am a first year Ph.D. candidate at an estimable North American university.

    Were I a religious woman, I would believe there was a special lockbox in hell reserved for people who confuse “your” and “you’re.”

    I can trace my ancestry back to two of this nation’s founding fathers.

    I have an irrational, love-hate obsession with John Derbyshire. Otherwise, I am seldomly irrational.

    Among my greatest peeves are sports, vegans, and poor grammar.

    ====== From your Profile – Your Stated Interests ========

    Hedonism, Sex, High Modernism, Rhetoric

    Movies: Truffaut, Herzog, Jarmusch, Fellini

    Music: Stravinsky (Firebird Suite.. or the Rites of Spring Patricia?)

    Books: Unamuno, Russell, de Tocqueville, Friedan, Hayek, Faulkner

    ========= End ===================================

    So Patricia, I’m sure you’ve heard that throwing stones in a glass house is not a good idea right? So here are some questions for you.

    What did your Marxist Daddy do to his little girl when he turned you on to all of that Cognac that you can now outdrink any man with?

    Why do you find such an overwhelming desire to express your sense of “sexual power” by bragging on the Internet how “few men do not find you irresistably attractive”.

    Why do you then go on to tell the world that only a few of them are worth a minute of your time and then go on to proclaim your interest in Hedonism and Sex?

    Why do you find such an impulsive need to show off how intellectually “superior” you are AND show a strange level of deep contempt for people with “bad grammer”? Could it be that you are struggling to cover up something that you are ashamed of?

    Why do you alternate so radically between longing for “Daddy” and then hating his guts with the obvious contempt you openly show towards him?

    For someone who shows so much contempt for “Daddy” you sure do work VERY HARD to mold your identity to his sense of Intellectualism.. I highly doubt that the above works were discovered completely on your own.. Could it be that you are still trying to please Daddy in some way?

    Could it be that you are still trying to be the “Little Woman of the House” that your Daddy wanted you to be once your mother passed away when you were still a little girl. A mother who was a radical feminist that your daddy obviously wanted to mold you into.. so that maybe you could be his own little wifey?

    Patricia.. If you find any of this to be cruel or harsh I must say that you only have yourself to blame. It’s like the old saying..

    The taller they are.. the harder they fall..

    And you Patricia C. Deyton-Knox have spent a whole lot of energy trying to convince the world how “tall”  (all 5 feet 10 inches as you say) you are..

    When in reality you are still trying to hide underneath the bed covers from a very bad time in your young life many years ago..

    I know this has got to hurt.. but it’s the only way I know of to wake you up.. and to hopefully get you to drop the B.S. get some real healing and to join the rest of Humanity someday..

    In the meantime.. I’m sorry to hear that your Daddy was the “man” that he was.. But do yourself a big favor next time.. Don’t take your anger out on Men like us..

    Because we are certainly not your Daddy..

    Good Luck..

    GL

  15. Rule62 on 10/07/2006 at 7:57 am

    My sincerest thanks for encouraging your ilk to head off to Russia. In doing so, you are doing the womenfolk of this country a wonderful service, and for that you have my gratitude.

    —————-

    You’re welcome. Good bye.

  16. Aaron on 10/07/2006 at 8:39 am

    People like Patricia are what is keeping western society to evolve at the pace is should be. Unfortunately they have to be taught a harsh lesson. Its the only way they will learn. When all the decent men have left the building (western society), is the time they will realise that you dont know what you got untill its gone.

  17. Taras on 10/07/2006 at 1:52 pm

    Like I said to another poisoned well of an American woman, he who laughs last, laughs best. We’ll be getting the last laugh when you realize what you had, and what you squandered only after it’s gone and there’s no bringing it back. Women like you accusing normal men of being mentally ill, evil, and oppressors makes painfully obvious just how deeply troubled you are. You have a great deal of turmoil and conflict regarding your father, losing your mother and it shows in your blog. If I was a pyschological profiler for the FBI or military, I’s see red flags galore with you. Sorry, but a mental basket case is not what any normal man wants. Call me names if you like, but there are many men like myself who are much happier being alone than chained at the ankle to a crazy lady like you. The demons you carry inside would make any normal man stay the hell away from you.

    Taras

  18. Hero on 10/07/2006 at 3:35 pm

    I would mock Patricia, but she’s made it too easy.

  19. Harvey on 10/07/2006 at 10:54 pm

    rw_man and others,

    It’s not that I don’t believe you guys it’s just that i have always been the kind of guy that asks why things are the way they are.

    It just seems odd. If people are wired to be attracted to certain things (for example: men are attracted to women with narrow waist and wide hips; women are attracted to men with resources/financial security). So if what we find attractive is largely innate then why would there be such large variation between what american and russian women find attractive.

  20. Harvey on 10/07/2006 at 10:56 pm

    Oh and one other thing,  is the sex ratio (that there are more
    women than men) narrowing or widening in russia?

  21. Joe on 10/07/2006 at 10:58 pm

    I see a more ulterior motive with the troll’s post.

    There have been some articles in mainstream press and tech journals about women’s groups complaining that feminist centered blogs do not get as much exposure as instapundit and 2blowhards. You know the same old line it is the whole evil Patriarchy thing. (yawn)

    This particular troll has made some comments in other anti-feminist blogs. So she is probably making the rounds to generate interest in her blog. Good luck.

  22. Joe on 10/08/2006 at 12:45 am

    It is widening Harvey.

    The average life expectancy of a Russian male is 59. For women it is 74. For the total population the sex ratio is 0.86 males/females.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Sex_ratio_total_population.PNG

    A great tool to use is http://www.nationmaster.com or the CIA factbook.

  23. QuietRebel on 10/08/2006 at 1:53 am

    The way how I see with this troll is that she is showing her Jekyll and Hyde personality.

    She is appearing being nice, respectful and happy while she is secretly being a emotionless and souless beast wanting to destroy good and decent men like here.

    I think she is trying to get more traffic to her blog. Her blogs are falling on deaf ears because of her pseudo-intelligent anti-male agenda.

  24. rw_man on 10/08/2006 at 3:46 am

    Hi Joe,

    Yes I realized that this was probably her motive but let’s just say she may be getting too much attention of the wrong kind after setting herself up like that.

    Oh Well.. Thanks again for your input..

  25. kzarz on 10/08/2006 at 4:02 am

    Patricia C. Deyton-Knox : Nuts, just totally nuts.

    I wonder, how do these nuts happen to come across this website. I think that they just want to pick a fight just to show us how intellectually superior (to a piece of dirt) they are. I think she’s just trolling for some of us to visit her blog and start something. Well I for one am not biting. She can blog with her feminist ilk til the cows com home or until their ovaries dry up.

    “It was a child’s foolish question. As everyone knows, there exists a crevasse of sorts between the persnickety minutiae of theory and the multifarious demands of day-to-day existence. Nevertheless, the essential paradox of that question is one that has continued to plague me throughout my adolescence and on into my adult life.”

    I mean really, does anyone talk like this? I wonder what Bertrand looks like? Probably like dear old Daddy.

  26. Rule62 on 10/08/2006 at 8:30 am

    I would really like to address Harvey because I understand where he is at.

    Yes there are certain basic things that all women and men find attractive. These are very basic things.

    Think of it in terms of a computer. Men are Windows machines and women are Apples. Ok, they all come with either Windows XP or OS X out of the box.

    Now, we set them all up and plug them in (in other words they’re born).

    Start installing software and applications.

    Here is where things go haywire in the States. The software that is on an American Mac (woman) is vastly different to that run on a Russian Mac.

    Same physical machine, same operating system, completely different computer though because the apps, utilities, etc are all different.

    So think of a Russian Mac (woman) as pristine, efficient and optimized. Think of American Macs as virus ridden, conflict ridden pieces of junk that crash (emotional conflict) every three minutes.

    Let’s continue the analogy. Do you want that optimized Mac or do you want a machine that is a total wreck? Sadly in life we can’t reformat :)

  27. Dennis Moser on 10/08/2006 at 10:20 am

    Good day Ms. Deyton, Knox,

    Welcome to this blog. Thank you for precursing your future submissions with your family Hx. and short ,to the point, thoughts. It is indeed a pleasure to see someone of your caliber frequenting this very positive omnidirectional site.

    In my vocation I have a unique privilege of working with 99.9 percent gifted and admirable women such as yourself.

    Everyday, I hear how well educated and qualified they are. I listen with an open mind. I hear how right they must be, because they have read so much and are so enlightened. I listen while they expose thier thoughts to thier colleaues, talking, carefully cloaking thier fragile inner being. And…I feel the hurt, the fear, the pain, the anger. Please continue with your counseling. I sincerely wish you some level of resolution and …,perhaps,… peace….

    If you would, please allow me to state something you already know….

    Feminism isn’t about equality.
    Feminism is about hurting men….(daddy)

    I extend to you my very warmest regards in the hope you will join us again. Dennis

  28. rw_man on 10/08/2006 at 1:56 pm

    Thanks Rule62..

    Great analogy!

    I can sleep well at night knowing that i live in a land filled with women who have good and proper software installs on top of their Operatiing System! God do I sound like an Uber-Geek or what. :)

  29. Taras on 10/08/2006 at 2:34 pm

    More like, sadly we can’t destroy the corrupted partitions on the hard drive and replace them with clean ones.

    Taras

  30. Neil Gendreau on 10/08/2006 at 6:33 pm

    As far as high maintenance behavior is concerned, I think American and Russian women have similar psychology. When all is said and done, irrespective of culture, women behave in a distinctive and predictable manner. However, I do believe Russian women are far less self-centered and seek a stronger masculine image for their partner.

    I have been pursuing a Russian bride for the past two years and visited Russia last summer to introduce myself to a 27 year old model/real estate agent and her six year old daughter. We had corresponded for 4 months over a reputable agency, meanwhile establishing seemingly good rapport. In person however, she turned out to be just as aloof, expectant, and demanding as most American women, yet you would never have known by the nature of her letters.

    As a consequence, I have continued my search by speaking with many other ladies simultaneously, some shy, sweet, and exhuberant, while others more sophisticated, reserved, and well polished.

    I have narrowed my choices among two ladies with whom I have placed phone calls, one who conveniently made herself unavailable the first time, the other more cautious than her previous letters would suggest.

    So my point is this – expect to be tested, but not so relentlessly as from American/Western women. If you possess more than reasonable skills and romanic caliber, Russian women will be more than willing to oblige your attention, but don’t expect them to instantly succumb to your charms. At best, they will require some additional time to trust you and at worst, they may remain no more reliable than most American women. However, Russian ladies display their personalities a versatile manner, albeit behind the typical mystique of common feminine whims.

    Their first priority, as yours to them, is to attract your attention, particularly via their profiles and with intriguing responses to your letters, which is an obscure gauge of who they really are in person, no different than reading an applicant’s resume before the interview.

    So as with any other relationship, before you get to the point of sharing common interests with them, you have to jump through similar hoops. The prevailing difference for Russian women is their receptiveness to your image as a man, and once they trust you, they are willing to become part of your life. However, you will still have to act like a man by demonstrating to her that you are decisive and capable of maintaining your responsibility for the relationship! How is that different than for any other woman?!

    Well in America, it makes virtually no difference anyhow! Therefore, pursue the Russian woman with greater confidence of a positive outcome!

  31. Harvey on 10/08/2006 at 8:03 pm

    Rule,

    That makes sense.

    And I believe what you guys are saying as I don’t think you would waste your time posting on here to spin lies.

    It’s just that on here I read these first hand experiences on how russian culture is so much better and healthier and same with the women.

    Then I go and read news on yahoo and see stuff like this which seems to indicate that russia is messed up socially:

    http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20061005/hl_afp/russiahealthsuicide_061005171705

    It is hard to reconcile the two.

  32. Joe on 10/08/2006 at 9:56 pm

    I understand your concerns, Harv. Russia is not perfect and neither is the US.

    The suicide rate in Russia is 74 per 100,000 for men. It is 13 or 14 per 100,000 for women. A huge difference. I believe in the US it is 19 per 100,000 for men and 4 per 100,000 for women. Here are some more alarming statitistics: There are 10 million more women than men. Or 88 males for 100 females in Russia.

    Now a professional and well educated woman from Russia has three options. First, marry a native Russian. Which can work out. There are plenty of decent Russian guys out there. It is customary to marry quite young in Russia. If there is a guy over 25 and unmarried, it usually means he cannot commit. Second, not marry at all. Third, find a western gentleman.

    Now most of the women in Russia are not looking for a FOREIGN husband. They are very proud Russians and extremely patriotic. There are searching for the ONE husband. It could be a native or someone from the West. Now they have options.

    • Taras on 08/20/2009 at 1:41 pm

      I’m sure if a man is willing to learn about Russian culture and learn the basics of the language, he would find a wife.

      Taras

  33. rw_man on 10/09/2006 at 12:26 am

    Harvey,

    Tough adverse environments either bring out the best or the worst in people. Russia certainly falls into this category.

    Just think about our own history of segregation in the south.. Some people folded under the pressure some people rose above it.. people like Condi Rice, Bill Cosby and many many others excelled.

    Back then many of these people understood that the only chance they had in surviving and overcoming this challenge was to be stronger then the environment that they faced.

    So you have a large percentage of Blacks who came from families that were very strict and proper in their upbringing and for good reason too. They wanted their children to be dignified and respected. This was the only way these kids had a chance in hell in being able to build a normal and successful life into the future.

    Is this really so hard to understand or to believe?

    It’s the exact same deal here with the women. We have women who fall by the wayside.. but we also have many who are just complete super hero’s in my book. Women who because of their adverse backgrounds are exactly the types who have the strength and dedication required to be the best marriage partners anywhere on the planet.

    And like what I keep on telling you before..

    These incredible women are accessible and looking for quality Men as well to build their lives with.

    Again one more time buddy..

    Don’t lose site of the forest from the trees..

    Your research and interest in this subject is admirable but I feel you are focusing too much on the micro and not the macro.. Don’t take every shred of news you come across and take it as a sign of doubt in what I and many others are saying. All news is questionable.. and this is exactly when you need to “take it with a grain of salt” as was once commonly said.

    Your ability to find a loving woman in your life WILL NOT BE BASED OFF OF THE NEWS.. It will be based on your own will power and determination.. and this is truly what it means to be a man..

    Again it’s this whole 10 percent 90 percent deal.. Are you approaching life where you believe that you are only in control of 10% of it.. and 90% of it is determined by external factors like the news that you read?

    Or will you finally get it that these percentages in life are actually the reverse?

    Because quite frankly Harvey this is how you are coming across and I need to admonish you a little bit here.. I’m not trying to be an ass but I do need to be straight with you because I don’t know if anyone else in your life would be willing to do this.

    You see Harvey if you believe that 90 percent of your life is externally driven not by you.. then no matter what I or others say on this blog won’t make a bit of difference to you. You will just continue to feed your belief in your “weakness” with all of these little news items that “prove” or give you the excuse that it’s “not your fault” if you fail.

    Believe me Harvey this one little bit of “tough” wisdom I’m giving you if you accept it will mean the difference between your happiness or your misery.. You can start your life on a different path by choosing now and orienting your communications towards that choice.. or you can just continue to have lingering doubt within and to find ways to prove it.. And then want me or others to prove you otherwise.. The choice is really that simple..

    I just gave you the keys to the universe Harvey.. and on top of that I told you where to go to use those keys to find a suitable and loving wife.. You can hold on to these keys for dear life or you can choose to throw then in the garbage can if you don’t believe they are real. The choice is completely yours.. but whatever you choose just be honest about it..

    Don’t get me wrong Harvey.. I’m actually grateful that you pose the questions that you do because it serves as a way of learning not just for yourself but for many others too. But what I’m immediately concerned about is the way you approach this personally. Because the last thing you want is to actually arrive here.. meet an incredible woman and then completely sabotage it because you have so much self-doubt running around in your head that you “don’t believe it’s real”.
    If you can’t get beyond this then you will attract exactly the wrong type of woman to you. A woman who is also filled with self-doubt and then you both get to fall into a hellish co-dependent relationship.

    Trust me my friend.. you don’t want to go that route.. and I’m doing what I can to help you.. but you need to show a little faith.. and man needs to stop looking for a woman who is maybe the mother they never had if they want a healthy relationship.

    If you want the best woman in the world.. then you will need to be the best man in the world. This will require leadership on your part. There are more then a few leaders in this group because quite frankly this subject attracts them because they have the fortitude to go against common convention… and you Harvey are fortunate to be among them.. read what they say carefully and how they say it.. and follow their lead..

    Harvey I know that you have great potential.. your life experience i’m sure is far from perfect and you can either rise above that like I mentioned before or you can be consumed by it. There is much purpose in the difficulties and challenges you personally have right now. If you can get beyond the doubt.. these experiences will bring you to a place where you can serve as a great beacon to others who came from the same situation. And when you reach this point you will gain a sense of peace, confidence and pride as a Man you never thought possible.

    You may not fully understand all of what i’m saying to you now.. but with time you will..

    Go for a long walk Harvey.. learn how to have a deep and humble conversation with the Man upstairs.. take time to reflect.. seek out a good teacher and mentor.. and take a break..

    I’m sure we will catch up with you later..

    Take Care, GL

  34. James on 10/09/2006 at 5:18 pm

    Patricia,

    Many of us can read both English and Latin fluently and we know merely from reading the title block of the blog that you and your “Society” are quite offensively conceited and have the emotional development of spoiled toddlers. Perhaps that is how you wish the world to perceive you.

    James

  35. QuietRebel on 10/09/2006 at 11:01 pm

    Harvey,

    I would suggest one thing that you can do… Throw all of those theories and anaylsis about Russia out of the window… GO catch a plane that’s heading to Russia and enjoy your adventure and those beautiful girls in Russia?

    Here’s the questions:

    Would you rather to be a college professor constantly falling into “analysis-paralysis” trap, sprouting out endless theories and thoughts, and not doing anything or never taking action?

    —-OR—–

    Would you rather to be an entrepreneur constantly searching for opportunities to exploit, managing the possible risks, finally take action and Let’s “Carpe Diem!”?

    For me, I would rather to get onto the plane and have time of my life in Russia instead of being stuck in the states sitting on my laptop constantly looking for information on Russia and Russian girls regardless of either positive or negative about Russia and complaining how bad girls and society really are.

    I am managing the risks by studying the Russian language and their culture and social ettiquette as well as learning from men here on the blog.

    So, What are you choosing to do?

  36. QuietRebel on 10/09/2006 at 11:03 pm

    Whoops! My grammatical mistakes after the two questions…

    Here’s the correction:

    For me, I would rather to get into the plane and have time of my life in Russia instead of being stuck in the states sitting in front of my laptop constantly looking for information on Russia and Russian girls regardless of either positive or negative about Russia and complaining how bad girls and society really are.

  37. Max - sydney on 10/10/2006 at 12:06 am

    Harvey – the other thing to remember is that Journalists are generally knuckleheads.

    Why do you think all the “thinking people” read Blogs?

    worse in Australia (and its probably the same in the USA) there are THREE TIMES as many Publicists/News agents/ PR reps as their are journos.

    There is a very high likelyhood that anything you read in the news has been generated by a PR rep with an agenda and fed to journo with column inches to fill and their own original material evaporating with the passage of time.

    As the boys have said above trust God and your own street smarts more than these grown up library nerds with a press pass!

  38. Joe on 10/10/2006 at 3:05 am

    Right on target Quiet and Max.

    During my 2 years and plenty of trips to Russia and Ukraine, I’ve never had a bad experience. I never felt threatened or in danger. Just the occasional corrupt police officer and customs official, but plenty of experiences that go beyond description. There are certain areas in the USA, I wouldn’t go near and it is the same in Russia.

  39. Aaron on 10/10/2006 at 7:06 am

    There is a show here in Melbourne,Australia called “Real stories”. one story was trying to persuade the audience into thinking all russian mail brides are men by re’enacting a story about a guy gettting a hairy man sent down to him. The show is hosted by a women by the way.

  40. rw_man on 10/10/2006 at 7:21 am

    Max you hit it on the head with journos and their agenda.. It’s business man.. to sell more papers, magazine and advertising.. And the only news that sells is bad news.. That’s just the way it is so one has to be aware of the fluff in order to get the nuggets of truth.

  41. rw_man on 10/10/2006 at 7:25 am

    Hi Aaron..

    God that stuff pisses me off..

    This is exactly the kind of B.S. that does so much damage in scaring quality men and women away from each other. The only thing we can really do is just to spread the word on our own to set the record straight. Thanks for sharing that.. GL

  42. eddyblip on 10/24/2006 at 9:12 pm

    I stumbled over this site… What a thoroughly interesting blog and have now added it to my faves. After divorcing my ex last year who had issue upon issue with this, that, everyone and everything, its a ‘breath of fresh air’ to read what has been written here.

  43. rw_man on 10/25/2006 at 2:20 am

    Hello eddyblip!

    Welcome and thanks for your comments. Many divorced Men come to this site because of the contrast that it offers to many of the experiences that they’ve had. You will find some good information here so please continue to contribute and to spread the word with your Mates!

  44. edyblip on 10/25/2006 at 7:34 pm

    hello rw_man
    thanks, I’ll contribute what I can, I live in Southern England and with the opening up of the EU we have many East Europeans who have come over and settled, Southampton in particular has a flourishing Polish community. One of them, (wasn’t sure if she was Polish or Russian) worked in our canteen on the breakfast bar, a stunning young lady, lovely smile and always so cheerful and a lovely accent. just her attitude used to cheer me up. As an added bonus, she used to slip in an extra slice of bacon into my toastie so I had 3 slices rather than the usual specification of 2.

    Sadly staff turnover in our canteen is phenominal and she left ( the boss is a right cow). I rarely go there nowadays. Sadly, I was married at the time.

    ah, I can see and hear her now, big blue eyes, blonde hair, lovely smile “yezz pleeezz”, it used to make my day. oh well.

  45. rw_man on 10/26/2006 at 3:38 pm

    Hi edyblip..

    Loved your story.. If that one experience in the breakfast bar left you with that type of lasting impression just try to imagine what type of impressions you would have over here. Hopefully the photos on this site give you a slight hint about that. but as always photos just completely fail in doing these women any real justice as to how beautiful they are.

    Cheers! GL

  46. eddyblip on 10/26/2006 at 8:51 pm

    Greetings rw_man, thanks !.

    I often think of her when having a ‘condor moment’. If I hadn’t have been married I’d have definately made a pass, it is something I now deeply regret. Visiting Russia, well, it is tempting isn’t it, my problem is I’m a single working parent of 3 young kids. I guess we could all go to Russia for a holiday next year. I’ll think of something (but am open to ideas).
    cheers
    eddyblip

  47. JR on 11/02/2006 at 1:00 pm

    You wanna know what women are after? Check out:
    http://music.msn.com/news/article.aspx?news=240026

    $$$$$$$$$$$$

    The author is a woman and asks the right question: “…it’s a wonder why celebrities marry at all.” But she should have added, it’s a wonder why rich celebrity men marry when it is clear they will be legally robbed when the time is convenient for for Honey to cash in her chips. Go ahead and figure what percentage of these stories figure the guy getting half of the wife’s estate.

    Look no farther for your smoking gun.

  48. brensgrrl on 11/16/2006 at 7:59 am

    Stuipid.

    You want your woman to be beautiful. Great figure, hair, nails, dress. Yet you don’t want to pay for it.

    How the hell do you think beautiful women get that way? Beauty isn’t free! As a former professional model, I can tell you that it costs money. Don’t expect your wife to have a stellar appearance if you aren’t willing to pay money to help her keep that appearance up.

    Besides, what have YOU done to keep your own appearance up? Bald heads and beer bellies aren’t attractive to us women either.

    • J on 08/20/2009 at 12:14 pm

      I can’t comment on the physical-state of many of the men here, but I’m sure the picture you paint is infact the minority.

      Take GL himself, he’s stated how living in Russia massively IMPROVED the way he looks, through a better lifestyle leading to some quite dramatic weightloss (good on you guy)!

      I cycle over 110 miles A WEEK, do weights, eat incredibly well and – if I do say so myself – have a very fine thick head of hair and I try to dress well. Bottom line, I take care of myself.

      I’m also smack bang in my mid-twenties. You know what? I don’t have any problems attracting the attentions of the girls here yet I choose to reject them because of the values they hold.

      So please, keep your ill-informed generalisations to yourself – not that you’re actually capable, as you’ve shown.

  49. Kara on 11/26/2006 at 4:47 pm

    Wow Brensgrrl! You seem to be quite the mutlitasker! A professional Model, a Professional Accountant, a Professional cook and man pleaser? Sounds like your stories aren’t exactly lining up. On top of that, do you know why women are hired to be models? Because they show off clothes, it has nothing to do with personality (have you ever watched America’s next top model?).

    Now don’t go making personal attacks on men there brensgrrl, not all of them want to date a man in a woman’s disguise.

  50. Taras on 11/26/2006 at 6:34 pm

    You’ve got that right Kara. Only a man who’s halfway to being a homosexual would do that.

    Taras

  51. Rick on 11/28/2006 at 2:53 pm

    This post/thread strikes a chord with me… A little background:

    Like many young American men, I was raised with notions of chivalry and putting women up on a pedestal. And like most of said men, I was repeatedly taken advantage of and manipulated/abused by women. In college I discovered NLP and the science of seduction, and learned how to “play the game” as it were, becoming very successful with women.

    However, the easier it became to seduce women, the more disillusioned I became with the whole thing. Through all of them, I could not find a single woman who was worth more than a quick fling. I found the whole western-women dating game shallow and pedantic, and the women all invariably damaged goods – wrecked by radical feminism and entitlement notions, with more baggage than a freight train. (this was at an Ivy League university btw, so that’s not surprising!)

    One day I was walking home from class, spied a very attractive girl working in one of the school offices, and proceeded in to introduce myself and seduce her. long story short, she was a Russian girl, had come to the US only recently to go to school.

    it was absolutely amazing – she was open, honest, compassionate, respectful, and above all – feminine. our relationship quickly grew, and now almost 8 years later we are happily married and our relationship is the envy of everyone around us, married and non-married alike.

    Now don’t get me wrong – having a Russian family/in laws has given me a lot of exposure to the Russian community and not all the women are angels – there are plenty of manipulative, damaged Russian women as well. And on the flipside, I remain confident that there are at least *some* American women who have not been ruined by our twisted matriarchial/liberal/pc/feminist society… however, I remain so incredibly happy I stuck to my guns and did not settle for an American feminista…

    I’m now of an age where many people I know are beginning to get divorced, and predictably, the men are getting raped in family court and having their entire lives destroyed for the entitlement of their abusive females. Every time I look at my wonderful, beautiful, amazing wife I thank god for allowing me to look into the gaping abyss of feminism and make it through the feminist gauntlet relatively unscathed…

  52. rw_man on 11/28/2006 at 6:26 pm

    Hi Rick,

    What an Awesome story man..

    I swear you could turn your story into a hit Romantic Comedy.

    You certainly are a very lucky man for having that chance encounter with your future wife on campus.

    Would love to hear more..

    Cheers! GL

  53. wolverine on 03/10/2007 at 6:06 pm

    Well, I have a story about how I got rid of a feminasty gf. I was working on my car, and she was coming out for something or other. So I asked her to pick a few things up at the auto parts store. Here is the list:
    Unobtanium spark plugs for a diesel that fires on all four corners of the cylinder.
    Reversible left handed ratchet.
    Muffler berrings and grease.
    A bucket of prop wash.
    Some K9P.
    Blinker fluid.
    A can of night air for my tires.
    A metric crescent wrench.
    Compression straightener.
    Glass welding rods.
    Cross drilled brake lines.
    Hollow spark plug wires.
    Tire filters.

    Then I told her that they didn’t like to give many of those parts to females, so she might have to ask forcefully at least 9 times, and perhaps check 5-6 stores.
    From personally experience, I would recomend full specil forces body armor when she gets home. Mine tried to hit me with a shovel till she couldn’t chase me anymore.

  54. Craig on 03/10/2007 at 7:13 pm

    Wolverine, that’s a scream.

    Reminds me of the guy who went into Radio Shack and asked if they had a flux capacitor. He had them runnng around for 10 minutes looking for it.

  55. Clinton Bland on 01/31/2008 at 10:04 am

    Intersting stuff. The american woman has become very matericalistic. To see my views on the matter check out my book (American Epidemic: High Maintenance Women)on Amazon or at the book’s website http://www.americanepidemic.net. If you’d like to chat about it then contact me at the link on the book’s website.

    Regards,

    Clinton Bland

  56. Luke Skywalker on 02/01/2008 at 5:16 am

    When I was in high school, a “high maintenance woman” was a woman who was especially clingy, and who needed her boyfriend by her at all times. Back in my high school days, if you spent $300 on your girlfriend, in total throughout your entire relationship, then you were considered to be spending way too much money on her, and you were liable to be teased for that by the other boys.

    This other concept of “high maintenance woman” was something that I had never even heard of until about three years ago — seriously. I think it’s ridiculous, and it beggars belief why any man at all would ever go along with it.

  57. martin on 05/27/2010 at 9:01 am

    Wow, i’ve been reading almost every entry on this site. It’s such an eye opener. I’m currently an undergrad studying engineering here at SJSU. I can’t wait till I get my degree and explore Russia.

    As a member of the SF PUA Lair, I can tell you that it’s a bitch learning all the tactics and games. My last gf dumped me and after a while, I realized the reason why she left was because I didn’t use PUA tactics on her. I actually treated her with the utmost respect and thought using PUA tactics was below me, or at the very least I loved her too much to play games with her.

    I’m so glad there’s still a place where you can be a gentleman and not have to sell your soul and go Darth Vader to find a girl.

  58. rw_man on 05/27/2010 at 1:26 pm

    Hi Martin,

    Glad you found us. Keep in mind that even-though I don’t recommend PUA tactics in this part of the world.. I’m also not saying hey go and wear your heart on your sleeve and she will love you for it.. No No No No…

    Dating here was and is always meant to have a significant degree of mystery to it. It’s all about gradually building trust and knowing how to read and respond to the subtle signs that a Russian Woman gives out when she “sees you as a Real Man” as they say in their culture.

    In their traditions.. they either see you as a serious man with serious intentions or they don’t…and keep in mind they will read every aspect of your personality to determine this.

    You could be the most handsome guy in the world but if you come across as some player then you will only attract the types of girls you are best suited for… and that is not a compliment in this case.

    Develop a confident and strong identity to who you are and you will find this to be more important then any PUA technique out there.

  59. Lesson Learnt on 09/29/2011 at 1:46 am

    To be fair look how other mammal species mate. There is usually a dance of some kind, the male makes overtures the female checks him out and they go back and forth for a while before she accepts him.

    All of our cutural values, rules of courtship, family marriage networks etc.etc are there to paper over our harsher, baser instincts and ensure greater prospects of a longer lasting relationship.

    The pick up stuff is really harsh and fake but nowadays everyone wants to believe they are ‘winning’. Even if you think you are how long will it last for either of you? Very soon you will have to become yourself again and be natural and so will your partner. Then there will be nothing there.

    In the long term the relationship cannot last if each one is focussed on ‘winning’ by putting on an artificial face.

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