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I believe that the biggest mistake that any Man can make in regards to a relationship with a Russian or FSU Woman is to naively look at it as a simple “transaction”.
Actually let me correct myself on that..
The dumbest thing that any Man can do in regards to Russian Women is to see them as a willing commodity to be picked up on a whim.
Now I KNOW that none of our readers would think of these Women in this regard..
BUT it’s still worth mentioning so that we all understand that going down to our local supermarket to pick out one of these Special Ladies is NOT an option.
So you may be wondering what a REAL Relationship with a Russian Woman is all about.
Well one of the WISEST things I’ve ever heard about Traditional Russian Women is this..
Traditional Women like these who are truly in touch with their identities…
ABSOLUTELY WANT to have a Life that is solidly built like a HOME.
And the perfect HOME for them has FIVE very important rooms to it.
The 1st Room is her desire for an EDUCATION
With this education comes the foundations for pride, self-confidence and her ability to embrace the world. And personally I LOVE a Woman who is both sexy and has some serious book smarts to her. Tolstoy anyone?
The 2nd Room is her desire to become a loving WIFE
And yes let me spell that again for anyone who may be a little confused about reality or so liberally inclined.
That’s W.. I.. F.. E..
Because after all a Princess must always find her Prince. And this my friends will never go out of style no matter what a Culturally Marxist society does to try to tear it down.
(Actually let me clarify this with a little more precision.. It will never go out of style no matter how many scorned, over-ripend, unattractive, bitter, weight-challenged, jealous, single and alienated women scream out within the depths of their own self-denial about a “Fish not needing a Bicycle”.)
The 3rd Room is her desire to become a MOTHER
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again.. Perhaps the biggest aspect of Woman-hood is MOTHER-HOOD. MOTHER Nature had every good reason in the universe to make women into the elegant baby making machines that they are. And this incredible mechanism sits within the very genetic structure of every cell within a Woman’s body.
(And any Woman who actively denies this part of her identity is probably fulfilling some Darwinian mandate of “survival of the fittest.” Because obviously.. she sure AIN’T IT in the mental capacity department and it’s probably best that a woman like this has no desire to pass her genes forward)
The 4th Room is her desire for a CAREER
This is where it starts to get tricky. Because although the pull of mother-hood is strong.. There is another desire that all Women have for self-sufficiency, economic participation and professional / intellectual growth.
I for one fully support any Woman’s drive towards this as long as it doesn’t jeapordize her family’s welfare.
No one said this was an easy balance to strike.. But for some magical reason Russian or FSU Woman knows how to pull this off and that simply makes her all the more valuable.
(And Gentlemen once you see a Russian Lady’s priority towards her family in action you will have ZERO tolerance for the typical excuses that a Western Woman throws at you regarding this issue. Also keep in mind that for many Western Women this “4th Room” is where the construction project ends due to their short-sighted reach for “Visible Power” and meaningless Material Gain. There will be no comforting Nursery.. And perhaps not even a shared and warm bedroom for her to sleep in as well.)
The 5th Room is her desire for SELF-FULFILLMENT
This could be any Womanly self-pursuit that is anchored in her Mind, Body and Soul. Every human being has a right and destiny to reach for the “Better Angels of their Nature”. The choice is certainly everyone’s to make and it is perhaps one of the most personal decisions possible in relation to choosing your identity.
Wisdom always comes with experience..
And to someday happily stand next to a Lady who is both beautiful and wise as a guardian angel is I believe the dream of every True Man.
Imagine for example that your future Russian lady is already an accomplished pianist or singer and wishes to bless the world with her musical talent. I don’t know about you but if this situation applied to me I’d be the first one lining up for tickets and smiling all the way..
Ok so you may be asking yourself..
This is all nice and good to know but what in the heck does this have to do with a Relationship with a Russian or FSU Woman?
Well Gentlemen.. The REAL Truth is that it has EVERYTHING to do with it..
Not a little bit..
Not even a lot..
But EVERYTHING.
And the Bottom Line is this..
The BIGGEST thing you can do to secure the ABSOLUTE LOVE and DEVOTION of your special Russian Woman is to become a LEAD Construction Partner in helping her to build all FIVE of these rooms.
Now obviously the construction and occupation of these rooms will happen at different times in her life.
Sometimes she will spend a great deal of time in one room while other times it may be more spread out as in Wife, Mother and Career.
But whatever the case is it is your JOB as a Man to mutually lay the foundations down for each of them.
Because each Room will contain a level of appreciation, affection and devotion towards you as a HUSBAND that will go beyond measure.
And this Gentlemen is the sense of Purpose, Satisfaction and Happiness that YOU’VE ALL been looking for.
By always planning ahead on this big picture for her you are practically guaranteeing that the two of you will stay on a happy forward moving path together.
A Traditional Russian or FSU Lady would never dream of leaving you if this construction project was the master plan that you initiated and designed with her.
Indeed she will be EXTREMELY PROTECTIVE of both it and you..
Because this is HER HOME Dammit..
AND You as the MAN are expected to be the Leader of it..
And it certainly wouldn’t surprise me one bit if she just as readily starting locking and loading a Kalashnikov to keep “Foreign Invaders” away from it.. and from you..
(Which by the way has truly happened more then a few times in Russian history just in case you wanted to know.)
Now Gentlemen listen carefully..
Again you have just been freely given the keys to the known universe in terms of finding happiness with a beautiful and traditional woman.
You want to learn what the most important thing about courting a Russian Woman is?
Well you just read it..
Being socially acceptable.. having self-respect and a decent appearance.. knowing how to be relaxed and confident in your own skin.. being modestly cultivated.. and knowing how to make a girl laugh and smile at whim..
These are all good and very important things..
But it’s most critical importance comes into play during the initial DATING PHASE of any Relationship.
Or in other words… it simply opens the door for you…
BUT THE MOST IMPORTANT PART..
(Or shall I say the remaining 99% of any happy and married life spent together.)
Where you are walking through this door..
And not getting kicked out..
Is a very long term, ongoing and extremely satisfying Construction Project.
If you as a Man have been worthy and skilled enough to open this door to her interest and imagination with the dates you’ve had together.
And now you want to find The BEST way to be invited into her heart..
Then make sure “she knows that you know” what these precious FIVE Rooms are.
But most importantly..
Make sure she see’s you pulling out the blue prints..
Putting on your tool belt..
And getting down to some serious work.
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First, I would vote for Mascha for any office for which she cared to compete.
Second, Five Rooms is a useful post!
Third, Mascha…Do you have any girlfriends who are NOT drop-dead
gorgeous??????
What a wonderful picture of Mascha! I have to hand it to you RW_Man, this photo not only highlights her beautiful face, but your skill as a photographer. She could be confused for a model in this picture. Your post is also spot on as well, I enjoyed reading it.
Taras
GL,
Thank you for your insight, as always fun and pleasureable read. Now if I may i’d like to add my two cents to your post (not that they are needed).
Certainly dealing with a FSU woman is very different in terms of her needs and her wants in comparison to any other western woman. In any case I will refer to any woman in general as a partner (cause there are few, very few with similar values in the west). I think that the objective of a couple should be to make each other as happy as you possibly can. Its not about the money, its not about the sex, its not about the fisical beauty. Those things can and certainly will go to a second plane when your focused on making your other half happy. We all have dreams, desires and flaws and within these we make our choices. What can be better than to have besides you a partner who will encourage your dreams, someone who will give you wings instead of cut them. How much more fun and excitement will there come to a relationship if you both keep achieving dream after dream even if small.
Now, the hard part is to be able to find someone who has dreams and desires of a life that is compliementary and not opposite to your own dreams and values. I think this is where many of the men who read your blog agree that a russian woman for them is the way to go.
Be happy yourself before you can go and try to be happy with someone else. Emotional baggage is a no no in any relationship. Help your partner build his/her dreams and become a fulfilled human being, if you select your partner well you will find fulfillment for yourself in the process too.
Just some personal thoughts.
T.
Hi Fritz,
Mascha for office???
As in Mascha for President?? Sounds intriguing
She’d inject a lot more fun into the mix for sure..
GL
Hello T,
Please don’t apologize.. your insights as well are great and very valuable.. Not carrying emotional baggage is indeed an important issue so keep chiming in..
Thanks again..
GL
Hi Taras,
I forgot to mention this but unfortunately I didn’t take this photo.. My close friend was the skilled one with the camera this time
Nikon D-Series camera’s are awesome to work with though since we both have one.
Oh well better luck for me next time..
GL
Excellent article RW. And keep in mind, what we Western men see so clearly in the women of Russia CANNOT be found in North America. It is the society and lack of comforts that forage this spirit in these beautiful women. To have not, is the desire they wish to have. What we take for granted.
Sure, there are some good women here, but they are already spoken for and living what they wish. New ones are lacking. And for me I think I have found my diamond. Time will tell.
Canajun
Good subject GL. Also to find this attitude in our country is virtually impossible. To see and understand where these women come from and to survive as they do is amazing.
For those raised under the Soviet Union and to make it successfully adds more to their character. So many things we take for granted yet are a luxury to most other countries. They are lovely, charming and strong in so many ways. To know them is to love them.
Good one – I think a lot of your prescriptions suit women from across the world, not alone in Russia.
Especially in India, which has had a predominantly patriarchial society, we need to learn to handle women big time. This is proved by the exponentially rising relationship breakdowns, left, right and centre.
a point to ponder for sure.
And appreciate the beauties you capture – i feel very relaxed when I see your blog. In india, everything is loud – the pics u put up are so natural and soothing. It is great that there are no sexist or deregoratory comments on these pics. I hope you dont get some and delete them.
So True Jacque.. So True.. GL
Hello Raman,
Thanks for your sentiment.
And yes this post certainly applies to Traditional Women around the world as well I agree.
I also love the idea of beautiful soothing women myself. Hyped up shows like “Girls Gone Wild” is certainly not my cup of tea either.. Just need to hang out in a place like this and you will get re-balanced and back in touch with true reality pretty quickly I believe.
GL
Hello Everyone..
Please don’t forget to click the yellow DIGG button above and submit your vote on this post if you like it..
Every vote we get brings counts and brings in more valuable chances for other men to realize that they have options in their lives.
Thanks again..
GL
GL,
I like how you stress that the man is the one who is going to lead this project. Every woman is going to want this house built but they most likely won’t have any idea about how to properly build it. Our failing western matriarch relationship structure is proof of this. Most relationships here have 2-3 of these rooms and usually the woman is only in one decorating it and letting the rest rot
SiSD
~Dugg~
Hi Sunny,
You pretty much nailed it..
I would like to know as a percentage how many women in the US or the West have maxed out their home at 3 rooms because of some very poor choices in their lives.
GL
Here´s a site written by a russian woman that is worth taking a look.
http://www.annaershova.com/blog/
Hi Bob,
Thanks for the link.. There’s some good stuff there. Nice to see a blog like this giving a more 3 Dimensional View to our favorite subject.
GL
Bob
That is a great website, thanks for sharing it. Anna seems like a switched-on girl and her writing is insightful and snappy.
I was interested in this comment of hers. I’m intrigued by what the Russian women sites say about the Western men who think they can claim them as ‘mail order brides’. Here is an insight from Anna:
“By the way, the Russian-speaking internet is full of stories about Western men who would engage in an online relationship with a Russian lady, then invite her over, where she would learn her knight in a shining armor is in fact homeless/a father of six children he had never mentioned/has a different job from what he claimed to have/disabled. It looks like Russian brides and their potential Western husbands are even.”
Hi GL,
Another grand piece of writing, full of insight and good advice. Thanks for being the torch for the rest of us.
Incidentally, the fish fell in love with the bicycle, married the bicycle. Unfortunately, the bicycle broke not long into their married life and now the fish is left broken hearted over the bicycle that she thought she supposedly did not have a need to begin with. True story.
I also want to provide a link to an article concerning courtship. The article provides a historical perspective of how courtship used to be back in the good old days and how it has transformed into modern day dating. It also discusses the draw backs of modern day dating. So anyhow, enjoy:
http://www.boundless.org/2000/departments/beyond_buddies/a0000234.html
There is also a good reference to a good book; an anthology of historical writings on topics about courtship and marriage. An excellent read for those interested in learning more about love, romance and courtship the old fashion and traditional way…
It’s called “Wing to Wing, Oar to Oar: Readings on Courting and Marrying” By Amy and Leon Kass.
-M
wow! i’m really impressed after having read all the articles and comments here. thank you very much, guys, for your high opinion of russian women))) it’s so unusual. for most russian men we are just slaves who are supposed only to cook, clean everything up, bring up kids and take care of our husbands…they do not take us as individuals with our own wishes and needs(
T., your comment is great)))
Privet Yulia
Always nice to have a Russian Lady like yourself joining us and commenting on this site.
I’m sure it’s also a real surprise to you as well that a such a large number of Western Men would appreciate Ladies like you to this degree..
Well it seems that we both have much to gain don’t we?
In any case.. I’m happy you’ve joined us..
Please do me a favor and share what you’ve found here with other Russian and FSU Ladies on the many Russian Language discussion boards that are out there.
I really appreciate the fact that you’ve read all the article so you are in a very good position to report what this site is all about to your fellow sisters online.
Balshoi Spaciba! Shusleeva..
GL
I would like to say that it is a very wonderful thing to see such a gorgeous woman with those eyes that burn like flames and a face that can only be compared with a perfect angel, like Mascha’s. From where I come from, there are not women as gorgeous as she is and what a blessing to have this eyes to admire the beauty that perhaps not many are able to see ever in their lives, not even on the internet. Being a love relationship with a Russian woman like Mascha, here sounds like a miracle made come true based on the descriptions of the Russian women personality described on this site. I understand a love relationship is very challenging from the fact that everybody have a different opinion of what is right and what is wrong because perhaps is easy for everyone to get together as lovers but living together as work as one is not an easy task, especially when material things are in between. Something I love to read about the Russian women description on this site is, that if it is possible to achieve a stable relationship with a woman as a husband and wife in Russia, then is worth the price to pay! What other thing can be better than a woman having ambition and aspire to grow as a professional and as a mother? Where can be found the woman with principles strong enough to make everyday a delightful experience in all aspects? Women like these should be rewarded with support and faithful loyalty, because a faithful woman with principles and commitment in a love relationship is simply priceless and worthy of the greatest pride.
Hiran.
Hi, I am looking for some advice. I realize Russian and Western culture is different and trying to figure out what my future Russian wife is trying to tell me.
She comes from a great family in the Samara area where we live. I work in the oil business and work away from home. We have an apartment and live with her daughter who is 10 and mother who is 60. I get along with both. I also get along with all her relations. My wife is 34 and I am 50. We met two years ago. Her English is good. My Russian is poor but I am studying.
Everything went well, in the begining she was very attentive ( and wonderful in relations) and wanted to to talk to me everyday I was away at work, we exchanged many tender SMS during the day. She works very hard on the job and at home, as do I, we both clean house, she cooks, I do dishes and clean up, defrost the fridge, etc. I praise her often, I think the world of her.
About 8 months ago everything changed and I do not know why. She is very guarded about talking to me about her feelings. I have tried to get her to open up but it is difficult.
I went away to work one day and honestly felt that things were going great. Our relationship was growing and she said she was very happy. Then suddenly she said she doesnt want to talk everyday, that I was trying to control her and the tender SMS changed to a few short meaningless words and then dropped off to nothing. When I call she doesnt want to talk more than 5 minutes and I feel tension if I can more than 1 or two times a week. We used to talk for an hour.
I was confused about why she said I control her, she sees her friends when she wants, goes on trips with her daughter but she feels now that I control her. I explained that I like to call everyday and hear about what she is doing, what is important to her. What her mum is doing? What her daughter is doing? Etc.
I have tried to talk to her she has told me that:
That the most important thing in a relationship is respect. That man and woman have respect for each other.
That slowly, little by little we shall grow to love each other.
That her love for me is less when I show her so much attentiveness.
That I try and control her.
I know that she feels that she felt indebted because I bought her an apartment (its in her name), a car, supported her education, etc,
All this happened before we were married and she still wanted to get married.
She has told me why didnt I find her 15 years ago.
We were married and now after 4 months she just feels happy with me near but not close. She doesnt want the tenderness. I feel more the friend than the husband. Making love she always asks be quick. It now seems that making me happy is farthest from her mind. She knows I am hurt but she doesnt want to talk or change. She does like buying clothes for me and fixing me meals.
When I dont phone for awhile she gets upset and is worried. When I phone more than 2 times in a week she gets upset. I am soooooo confused. Am I crazy??
I would like to add that when the big change occured she started locking her phone (I dont touch it or browse through it, but everyone has always brought it to her if it starts ringing. It is at this time you can see the locked sign), one time she gave the phone to me as we were dicussing picking a day for the family event, I moved from one month to another (a couple of clicks) and she grabbed in from me, looked to see I was still on the calendar and then gave it back). Also after the change she was really pushing me not to contact her in the evenings and was very tense when I did (her daughter and mum were still home) but I felt she was trying to break my habit. She would get very angry. Two months later her daughter and mother were out at the summer cottage and she was home alone for several days, after this she was not as angry when I called in the evenings. I have a son who has an anxiety disorder. He would always get tense before he would do something he wasnt suppose to and then relax when it was over. This was the same. My wife also has an anxiety disorder.
I can not believe she would cheat on me and not tell me. But I am confused as to what is going on. Sometimes I think she found someone as a lover and has me as the father figure and responsible person in her life. I do not drink or smoke. I am not perfect but I try and learn from my mistakes.
I want to get close to her. I love her. I try and give her every support I can. I try and support her. She says she loves me and tells me she crys when I leave for work but she can not be close to me. I am confused. Could it be she was a different person until she felt safe with me that I would never leave her? This is embarressing to write. I am looking for advice. I hope you dont print this but contact me instead by email. I dont have anyone else to ask who knows about Russian culture.
Thank you and hope you can help.
Hi Tim,
Sorry to hear about your situation and to be perfectly honest.. what you are describing about your relationship doesn’t sound good at all.
If your instincts tell you that she’s cheating then there’s a good chance that this is happening. Given everything you are talking about I would certainly guess that if I were in your shoes as well.
She may feel beholden to you in a negative way because you support her and her family.. but this is a business arrangement and certainly not a marriage.
Given what you are telling me I would start looking for your next options away from her. I personally believe that this situation is only going to get more downhill for you.
You sound like a nice guy and this woman may be into this just to exploit you..
Don’t be surprised if she turns up the passion the more you show that you want to leave.. But do yourself a big favor and don’t fall for that. Life is way too short to be involved in a codependent relationship.
The great part about this is that you have PLENTY of other options where you are at. So make sure you make the most of them..
Good luck
GL
Hello, Tim. Like yourself, I read this blog from time to time, and I happened to see your post. I hate to tell you this, but it does sound as if your wife may be having an affair. I went through a very similar situation myself with my own husband during the last year. Certainly, no matter how much I tried to be the best wife I could possibly be, he only pulled away further. In the end, I found that he was having an affair.
Typically, I also feel embarrassed sharing such personal information, but I feel a lot of compassion for your situation. It is an extremely lonely place when your spouse pushes you away. I can only encourage you to surround yourself with family and friends who love you as you decide where to go next.
Take care and know that life will get better.
Anna
Hi Tim,
This site has got lots of good advice on relationships. Reading it is highly recommended if you, or anyone for that matter, are to avoid pitfalls and heartaches. Couple of advices that I can tell, and these are valuable advices that are here for all to take; all one has to do is read and consider.
Here goes on the advices:
1) Never lead a relationship with the greens. Those only invite the gold diggers. You want a girl who is into you for the affection, the time together the relationship. A relation is never on a good footing if one party or both has mercenary intentions.
2) Read up on GRY’s spec on Radar and build one for yourself. It’s a handy tool that helps you to look into a the truth of a person through subtle observation of their body language and facial expression. Add to that their actions, and together these speak volumes. We are a communicative species and much of we say can be used to deceive. Always judge a person on their actions, deeds and not by what they say.
3) Canuck wrote a nice piece on what true love feels like. These can be used to help you know whether what you have is real.
And lastly,
I was on a train once going from Kharkov to Moscow and happen to chat up with a Russian guy. He was a doctor, a surgeon on spinal injuries. Anyhow, he told me a great advice and that is to not spoil a girl in the beginning of a relationship. (You did this big time with the apt even before you were married) You always want the relationship to go through some tough time in a way to test whether she will stay with you or not. If not then, she doesn’t really love you. If she does, then she is somebody you can keep for a lifetime. He told me his own personal story that I will retell here so that everyone can also learn from his experiences. He fell in love with a girl who is older than him by two years while he was studying in medical school. His parents disapproved of the idea of him getting married to her so they basically disowned him and they never spoke to each other. Times were hard for him and his gal. He told me once, in the holiday around New Year, he was given a nice bottle of vodka to celebrate but instead, he stood on a subway entry to sell the bottle for food for him and his girl. She stood by him through all of this and to him, she passed the test of true love which is a self sacrifice of sorts. So he got his girl and married her. Now that he is a doctor, his income comfortably supports their family. And about his father, he got to see him on his deathbed and I think they did finally reconcile.
Anyhow, I did also put a good recommendation on a good book on what relations ought and ought not to be. I’ll repost it here:
It’s called “Wing to Wing, Oar to Oar: Readings on Courting and Marrying” By Amy and Leon Kass.
Good luck,
-M
Any way to find out what she is feeling? Any way to salvage the relationship? Maybe there is something I did wrong or missed? She tells me she loves me. I dont think she would lie. She must feel something for me. Or did she suddenly lose her love? Or maybe she found someone else? But if so, why marry me? Why not end the relationship?
Is it possible there isnt another man but instead she was being someone other than herself at first? Reflecting she doesnt appear close emotionally to her family as I would expect in western society.
What should I do? I dont want to leave her but my life is miserable now. Sigh!
Tim..
I agree with M. It seems like you are Mr. ATM to this woman and nothing more while she more then likely has a lover who takes care of her emotional physical needs.
There are people and women in this world who are willing to exploit you. And the worse thing you can do is to try to figure out her “feelings”. This is an ugly place to go and you don’t go into a den of snakes with liberal good guy thoughts of “understanding them” on your mind.
I know this is tough as hell on you I’m sure. You want this part of your life to work badly and you may decide to try but that would be like feeding the wolf more easy fresh meat as far as I’m concerned.
Be prepared for a battle unfortunately.. If and when you decide to leave and she realized that she no longer has a unlimited free ride meal ticket then things will get hostile on her end very quickly.
If and when you have the courage to get out of this and find something better for your life don’t drag it out. Do it quickly. The welfare of her mother and her children are her fault and not your own.
She was the one who rolled the dice in trying to exploit you and not the other way around. Don’t blame yourself. Just understand that you missed something earlier with your selection process and now you are sleeping with the enemy.
Tim be very very very grateful you don’t have a child with her. If this were the case she would use this child as just another weapon against you for the rest of your days and it would be the child who will suffer the most unfortunately.
In fact make sure if you do have sex with her to make sure you don’t get her pregnant because I would damn well bet that if she could try to lock you in she would especially if she suspects that you are on to her real agenda with you.
Sorry to be so brutally honest with you and again I know this really sucks in the worst ways imaginable.. But right now is a time for cold hard clarity and action and not self-pity or sadness. Give into this and you will forfeit your chance to build a happy life.
There are good russian girls and there are of course bad russian girls too.
I tend to focus on the good ones..
So make sure you understand what that really is and find that for yourself.
I believe you deserve it.
Look after yourself..
GL
Manoah,
That’s a helluva a great story about true loyalty and love..
Thanks for sharing that.
GL
Yep, I counseled 1,600+ divorced men between 1984 and 1993. Classic symptoms of an affair. Not 100% sure, but matches at a high reliability.
I am a Get The Hell Out advocate for AM. But, I tell them you gotta’ test, test, test. And, if you are not sure, then don’t marry her.
I also note that of all the women I knew in the States, including at work, I can only come up with a list of six women I consider totally sane.
Here in Mexico, of the 40 women who live near me, 3 are perfectly sane after knowing them well for a long time. That is 7.5% which is very high. However, that means 92.5% who are not good for marriage.
Most men pick women based on beauty. Big mistake.
Some time ago, on Filipina Hearts, there were stories of women who married AM. And, some of the women said the men proposed marriage the first time they physically met. Then, later these men come on MRA URL’s and announce foreign women are just as bad as AW.
Another thought. When a man marries a FW, and it turns out to be a disaster, it may be a surprise to him, but it won’t be to her own family and friends.
One of my wife’s cousins was well known as the laziest woman in this village. She was married or ‘married’, I’m not sure which, and her husband brought her home after a week or two and said he couldn’t work all day then come home and cook and do the housework as well.
She messed around; had a child born dead out of wedlock. then, a local woman attorney felt sorry for her, because everyone knew what she was, dug around on the Internet, and found her a husband in the US.
She is still with the guy, but no one here would have been surprised at anything that happened. The only person who had no idea what she is like is her husband.
Of course, I write about Mexico, which is not the topic here, But the principles are the same. You have to be sure.
irlandes I feel sorry for the man who married her unless she decided to change her ways. Listening to what men say I can understand why they fear getting married.
What a beatiful woman is in that photo… Russian women has a special beauty… I’m very lucky that i could live near this country, i’m living in Ltihuania, but i’m partly a russian by my blood… Lucky that, I could see such a beauty of our all great motherland… As far as i can remember here in Lithuania are not very good opinion about russians just because of influence of Western world, but looking straight to facts i haven’t seen more friendly nation than russians. All – russians, belarussians, ukrainians, lithuanians, latvians, estonians are from the same lands in East, we are not enemy we are friends… Our country is not such as Western countries, but our people have a great sence of humanity… When i’ll grow up untill right time, i would back to my motherland – Russia… I can say for someones who wants to emigrate from Russia, don’t do so, people in western wolrd countries are depressed and not happy, because they simple forgot what is mean to be happy and that happiness lies not in the wealth but in people minds, such problem is here in Lithuania too… I wish that you youth of Russia would keep your sence of happiness and playfulness…
At the end i would quate some words from russian song, i believe that only russians would fully understand that i want to express “Vzletaet krasnaya raketa, byot pulemiot neutamim, i znatchet nam nuzhna adna pobieda, adna na vsech – mi za cenoi ne pastaim…
I am so grateful for this blog and for your articles. I spent just 2 weeks in Ukraine (Kyiv and the countryside) when I was 17 and I fell in love with the people and the culture. I felt as if I were in a fairytale–the way they treated each other… And in so many ways I miss it. I appreciated this post because this is what I want and what I have been working toward, I just didn’t quite know how to explain it. I have an amazing mother (so please don’t think I feel cheated out of an example of what it looks like to be educated, wise, and happily married) but I feel that for many young American women our peers in the FSU serve as mentors for us. They celebrate beauty (inner and outer), vitality (of body and mind), and health, and we are encouraged by mainstream culture to be tough and sexy, to be street-smart but not too scholarly or intellectually intimidating. When I’m around these young women (and when I read your blog) I don’t feel like so much of a freak. I don’t compare to Lena, Katya, and Mascha (and the rest), but I am glad they’re out there. Please thank them for me.
Hello youmakemesmile and welcome aboard. I’m always very happy to learn of a lady like yourself who desires to choose a different path then what the status quo is offering.
You are right.. We have a lot to learn from these ladies and their celebration of inner beauty. Please come back and visit again
Hi GL,
I like that you’re writing about your love story. I like the idea that good men are on the lookout for good women. I like hearing about how nice girls win.
I like your discussions of how the history and traditions play a strong role in the identity of the women at the present day. “Happiness is a Home with Five Rooms” is a favorite article of mine to share with the men in my life. I take notice when you describe specific situations and behaviors, comparing and contrasting the differences between typical secular NA attitudes and the Siberian/FSU response. “Please, lets see Love Letters From Paris…” is a tactic I would have hesitated to try for fear I’d sound silly, but I achieved desired results (happy man who enjoys my feminine wiles). I like those articles because I learn the most from them and they give me practical expamples of how to better myself and the relationships with men I cherish and who value me. If Masha could take me shopping and Olga could be my fitness buddy, I’d have it made!
I will say, though, that the older I get (27 now) the more I realize that joy and warmth of heart are disciplines. I must fight to keep them. I like the articles that describe the strength of spirit and the spiritual beauty of the women you encounter. I haven’t led the typical NA lifestyle because of my morals (and logic) and I still find myself getting angry at how men have treated me. I work not to be careless or disdainful of my heart and emotions or someone else’s, and I have trouble. What’s it like for people who are careless?
Your blog reminds me that there are good men and women out there and helps me be a good woman. It puts things in perspective.
I practice in a small, Southern town, and many of my patients are elderly. Some couples have been married 40-60 years, and I enjoy asking them for advice. My patient today (48th anniversary) said it’s about “give and take. So many women don’t want to be women. They expect the man to do all the work and make money while they sit at home and put their nose to a TV. He’s at work, you’d better be working on that home.”
What should be common sense is now food for thought, but I’m trying