In Russia a woman is generally regarded as someone who is over 30.
When you call her a woman that implies that she is “older” and more established. When you call her a girl that means that she is still generally in her teens to late 20′s.
Mixing this up is considered an insult. So if you say, “I think you are an interesting girl.” make sure it’s with some one in her late 20′s our younger. Pretty simple huh? Good now don’t forget it when you arrive here!
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Some more peculiarities about it:
1. Speaking of a woman as a “girl”, you compliment her youthful look and energy, unless she appears too mature that it may sound derisive flattery.
2. Nevertheless, Russian “women” would often refer to their female companies as “girls”, or ironically say “as I am a [decisive, optimistic, picky, fragile etc.] girl”. It reflects their restless and unfading spirit.
3. In contemporary Russian language, “girl” ['de-voush-ka] or, more humorously and third-person-wise, “miss” ['ba-rysh-nia] is a more convenient denomination for friendly talks than “woman” ['zhen-shhi-na] that stands for philosophizing, work environment, and serious talks about relationships, sex and gender.
4. Different age groups may differ dramatically by lifestyles, psychology and attitudes. I promise to explore this topic in detail on my blog!
Best regards,
Comrade Natalia )
…and if you need to hail a stranger, or address a servicewoman, see #1. If she doesn’t look a “girl”, try “Madam” or “Lady”. She would feel pleased to be regarded one, unless her life conditions add too much bitterness to this feeling.
So does this mean if I speak to a lady in her 40′s but still younger than me, speaking to her as a girl is good or bad?
Canajun
Since 40, if she does look this age by style and complexion, it’s safer to wait and see if the woman chooses to call herself a girl. Your own age doesn’t matter: “patronizing” may sound diminishing to women – and do _you_ feel like underscoring the age issue?
But if she still looks, dresses and behaves a 30+/-… My Mother reaches 50 but any stranger would address her as a “Girl”, and she takes pride and satisfaction in it (just like so many energetic and well-groomed women of her generation).
a great note!
But isn’t it not the same elasewhere?
Axinia,
It is pretty much the same everywhere that I’ve been. In the US and Canada for example, calling a 30 to 40 year old woman ‘girl’ is treated kindly for the most part or somewhat as a tease or just kidding around. It isn’t something that would be said to a stranger however. I routinely say, “How’s it going, girls?” to the moms at my daughter’s school when I pass them talking together. Usually they make exaggerated ‘oohs’ and ‘ahhs’ or ask me ‘what I’m really after’. It is all meant as a courtesy and in good fun. On the same token, I have had close lady friends who are over 40 that take a bit of offense to being referred to as a girl. As one put it, “I’ve earned the right to be called a woman” and I totally agree with her. She wasn’t upset with me for saying it but wanted me to know that she had been around the block a few times and had paid her dues along the way. I can respect that.
I have found the word ‘lady’ to be most acceptable to women in general. Lady implies dignity and respect and I think that most women would really like to see more of that in today’s world.