I gotta tell you word travels REAL quick in this town..
So if a man comes over here and does something totally stupid everyone is going to know about it VERY quickly… especially me..
Basically it starts with a friend of a friend of a friend who is a local taxi driver with an incredible story to tell.
A few weeks ago he was hired to be the personal driver for some relatively well off man from America who had been corresponding with a local girl here for some time.
This guy thinks he’s being a “real hero” for helping out some beautiful but “poor and unfortunate” girl anyway he can..
He hears one tragedy after another that has befallen this woman..
“Her dad died, her grandmother died, her dog died…” and on and on..
So now she and her poor brother have no one to help them to survive the ravages of this winter..
…and if she could just get some assistance from a loving and generous man she would be “his” forever…
So what does our “brilliant” Mr. Hero do?
Yup.. you got it.. he wires her cash..
First it was “this amount”.. Then it was “that amount”..
But of course she “needed” more and more for “that reason”.. and then “this reason”..
And oh by the way she appreciates what he’s doing soooo much that she would “Love him forever” and certainly be his future young bride..
So guess how much dough this guy ships over to her during the entire time up to his arrival?
Try 100 thousand dollars..
So he flies into town with an additional 2 grand in gifts that he’s going to present to her. He happily meets with his “future bride” and she suddenly tells him..
“I want you to LEAVE Russia NOW and never talk to me again..”
“WHAT!!! What about all of my money! I want it back!”
She calmly replies..
“Take your gifts back.. leave Russia and go home now before I call the Police and tell them that you are threatening me… If you don’t leave now you will be thrown into a Russian Jail..”
So “Mr. Hero” in anger and desperation consults with Mr. Taxi Man and gives him some money to do some “investigations” for him..
And as his “future bride” had correctly stated it was discovered that there was absolutely NOTHING he could do.. and in fact.. her “younger brother” was of course her live in boyfriend..
So what’s the moral to this story boys and girls?
Do I really need to say it again?
Sigh.. unfortunately I do because of idiots like this Guy..
DON’T EVER SEND MONEY TO A WOMAN IN RUSSIA YOU’VE NEVER MET!
Now normally this BASIC LESSON would end here but there are obviously some deeper issues that should be addressed.
Let me just say this..
I don’t feel sorry for this Guy one iota..
Would I hold gravity accountable if a Man decides to jump off a building and gets killed?
“Mr. Hero” got what he deserved in more way then you can imagine.. In some ways I don’t even fault the woman in this story because his stupidity in my opinion over-rides even her evil, greed and deception..
Am I being too hard on this “Poor Unfortunate Soul”?
No I’m not and let me tell you why..
As with all things.. this event has now started it’s own little destructive “Ripple Effect”..
- How many un-scrupulous Russian Girls who hear of this will now go out and do the same thing?
- How many good Western Men who hear this will have the idea re-enforced that “all Russian Women are thieves who are only out to exploit them”?
- How many legitimate Russian Women who hear this will only have their stereotypes of Western Men re-enforced as Desperate Men who only want to “buy a wife”.
- How many future relationships will this event sabotage for others?
You starting to get the picture?
This is just what we all needed.. another vicious cycle of mistrust and prejudice to fight against..
On top of that let’s take a deeper look at this guy..
Unfortunately he fits too easily the profile of one type of Man I’ve written about previously..
On one level this Guy probably actually believed that he was being a “true hero” in trying to help this “poor girl” out..
But on a deeper level he was just trying to buy himself a lifetime whore because money is the only thing he’s got and their ain’t much else he can show to represent himself as a Man..
And Gentlemen listen very carefully..
Any Man who needs to prove his value to others and especially to Women primarily through money..
…is Not a Real Man..
He’s just an everyday street “John” looking to pay for some fellatio in the front seat of his car in some dark alley..
So excuse me while I jump all over “John’s” stupid ass.
Because he’s certainly part of the PROBLEM and not any part of the solution that I’ve been working hard to promote..
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“A fool and his money…” as they say. Although I can’t see this happening very often at least at this extreme. Not many men have 100K to wire over.
I don’t get it. If he had that kind of money to throw around, why couldn’t he get himself a hot chick right here in the USA? (rare though they might be)
It sure sounds like this guy proves P.T. Barnum right about a sucker being born every minute.
Taras
Ouch!
He didn’t even try to seduce her…
No friendship, no flirting, no romance, no connection…
What a waste ! 100 000 $!!!
Ignacio
I certainly don’t have $100k to wire over. I barely have enough money to go to Siberia in the first place. And I have even less money than I thought I had so I will have to work my butt off this summer so that I can come in July. And I am not just going to Siberia because of the women. Yeah, my first visit here I’m not even going to try to find a wife. I’m just going to get a feel for it, because Siberia is a really great place to live because I love the cold, and I heard that Siberia was really beautiful from other people besides GL. Anyway, I just hope there are still some nice girls in Russia, and there is still a higher proportion of nice girls in Russia than there is in the United States, despite the recent propogation of bad influence that arose from this incident and other such incidents.
And GL: When you said to talk to you offline, did you mean talk to you by email?
–Luke Skywalker
Luke,
Like I said in this world called Siberia we have PLENTY of GREAT girls you will see this almost immediately when you get here. Yes email me for offline discussions..
GL
This is really sad. Many doofuses dont have 100k to wire over, but Id bet a whole lot of men get duped into giving away 2-5k.
I dont feel sorry for these idiots, but I find it very disconcerting that some scam-artists are making a living out of it in Russia…
Wow…
I almost feel sorry for this guy.
He sends $100K and gets threatend with Russian jail. Damn. Major let down for this guy. Lonely men do desperate things…
Anyway, Happy New Year RW_Man. Look forward to reading the blog in the new year. Maybe I’ll pay you visit next fall.
-R. Daneel Olivaw
I don’t get it. If he had that kind of cash to throw around, why didn’t he travel to a foreign country first, and meet some girls in person?
Well, it’s not as safe and simple as it seems…
http://russianwomenspeak.wordpress.com/2006/11/01/finding-russian-ukrainian-wife-travel-agency-or-online-dating-advantages-disadvantages-mistakes-success-tips-advice/
Happy New Year to all. Well, I agree with all that you state GL. Been there, done that.
I would say it is done for honor and perhaps desperation, but some of the ways women can control us are totally unfair. Girlish charms?
This may be so. I didn’t fall for near this amount, but alittle here and there can really add up for the shrewd scammer.
And the interpreters are into this also sometimes. I fell for that one once also. Okay, I was desperate at one time. Shoot me. But I did learn my lessons and the lovely lady I now prepare for would rather see ME at her front door over money. It must be love.
Canajun
Plenty of scam artists in Russia, this is just another example.
I just want to let you know that if you ask any Turkish men on the street what Russian women are like, they will immediately say that they are prostitutes. Sadly most of them in this country really are.
Sorry about this comment, but the truth about Russian women, as in any worldly subject, not so clear-cut.
Oh I’ll add that 90% of American women really are just disgusting, inconsiderate and don’t know what femininity means.
Hi Turkish,
I can’t say anything about Turkey because I’ve never been there but I do know that it is an extremely popular and easy place for all Russian to travel to.
I know that Turkey has always been a bit of a gateway to Central Asia , Russia and Europe so it wouldn’t surprise me if it attracts many of the Working Girls.
I’d invite you to come to Russia instead where 99.9% of the population of women here are certainly NOT Prostitutes.
You’re view point from Turkey only may be very skewed because of this.
I want to be very realistic here to everyone.. Yes we have scam artists that need to be addressed BUT they are in the minority as far as this population is concerned and unfortunately do great harm to the reputation and standards that most of the women here have for themselves.
That would be like trying to judge the US by watching MTV Videos only.. Rap Stars and Gangsters only right? Keep an open mind here and you will have much to gain.. close it and you will never know what you’ve lost..
GL
All Hails!
Some points to add.
Usually, a Real Russian Lady would behave “I-am-quite-well-off-and-don’t-ask-anything!” however poor she is against you. She would be very grateful for help and gifts, but it would take you significant MUTUAL ACQUAINTANCE and TRUST, and even so, certain EFFORT and/or TACT to PERSUADE her to accept them without remorse and suspicion.
Her main fears are: “Let him not think I’m needy, greedy or selling myself”.
ESPECIALLY if you touch “bare money”. However more convenient it is just to hand in cash to let her search, choose and buy what she needs herself,.. there is a strong sense of shyness about it. (In daily relations, Russian people need to “dress” money into a gift / free service / ticket etc., a shop’s (bank’s, service firm’s) gift certificate, at most – into a credit card, and at least – into AN ENVELOPE, whether they pay for some work, or endow friends and loved ones.)
AND, still more Russian Ladies shy away from saying anything like “love” and “yours” unless it’s “serious”, which is a looong way to go.
Another proof of harm that malpractice and prejudice are bringing, is that decent Russian women reciprocally shun Turks like hex, with deeply ingrained image of “dirty jerks”. (No “race hatred” here, just a constatation of a resulting fact.)
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
So what will become of this poor girl now that she’s cut off from her AUATMM (American Unlimited ATM Man)? Retire to a little villa on the Black Sea perhaps? Poor, poor girl. What a pity!
All joking aside, she’s a scam artist and, as such, she’ll probably be the object of some scam herself. Karma has a way of doing that. I suspect someone will scam her out of her ill-gotten goods and she’ll be worse off in the long run than if she had chosen a more honorable path.
But I don’t feel sorry for the guy either. How foolish it is to send any money, let alone large sums of money, to someone in a foreign country that you’ve never met.
Hopefully he’s wealthy enough that he can write off the $100K as just an expensive lesson in life without it being a severe finanical setback.
“All joking aside, she’s a scam artist and, as such, she’ll probably be the object of some scam herself.”
Possible but I doubt it. More likely she’ll just grow old and be alone once her womanly charms have worn off. People like that dont hang around or attract upstanding honest men into their lives…
By the way, I have my own blog now on WordPress. It is a tiny bit similiar to GL’s blog, but it is going to have some other stuff on it, too. Since I just started it, it doesn’t have too many things on it right now, though.
It is http://siberianow.wordpress.com.
–Luke Skywalker
>You’re view point from Turkey only may be very skewed because of this.
It probably is, like many others around here. Turkish word for working girl is “Natasha” and many tourist women from Russia are verbally abused because of this stereotype. Just tell your friends to be careful when/if they ever visit Turkey for a cheap swim and beach fun.
Good Day to everyone
I was about to close my mouth and bite my lips after reading this topic but I just can’t.
There will always be Mr Stupid in the jungle and a snake lurking around for a strike. Such a strong relationship between the user the abused and being used.
What really get me fired up is the fact that sterotypes still exists among different groups of people and it just simply breed hatred and prejudices…little did we know that we feed our own demons.
Amorcito
Ok I cannot sit on this. In my opinion the average american man is a man who is positive by nature and that is why the US is the most powerful nation in the world. The down side to this positive attitude is that some, NOT ALL american men tend to believe what they are told, particularly when it comes to some of the most attractive women in the world. Please gents, take this advice from an englishman. DO NOT SEND MONEY. The internet is a virtual world, use it to learn about Russian culture, and then you will soon see why scamming is such a good option for them.
Then get out to the FSU sooner rather than later!!!
Wow! somebody out there still likes us?
Imagine that! Thanks, e_g!
That is so true Amorcito. This guy though really has stirred up a kettle of hatreds though because of his stupidity. He’s no doubt badmouthing ALL Russian women right now, and the woman who told him to get lost no doubt thinks most or ALL American men are gullible losers. He’s succeeded in making all of us look bad, he deserved what he got.
Taras
[...] guessing probably not.. But at the same time there will always be a percentage of Men who come over thinking that money alone without any efforts towards self-improvement on their part [...]
Or was he jilted and the Taxi Driver told him what he wanted to hear? A lot of these “scams” crystallise when she has to get on a plane to see him in some far off land when she has never previously left the country. And she realises she hasn’t got strong language skills, she is helpless if things go wrong and just general low self esteem issues – is she good enough – what if she’s not? Most Russians, even educated ones, never leave their home city and the friends they have had since primary school.
Hi Peter,
The Taxi Driver was not part of the scam and this story was verified to me from another completely separate source.
Historically you are right about most Russians not leaving their home city but I believe that had more to do with the economics and strictness of Soviet Society where moving from one city to the other was often viewed with disdain and suspicion.
Remember that totalitarian government controlled everything and many of the trends are still in place that do not allow easy migration within the country or out of it as compared to the West. Thankfully I see this changing and this is what opens up this whole opportunity.
Thanks for your comments and please tell your friends..
GL
Well, there has been more economics than suspicion about inter-country migration.
In the Soviet Union, the standard was, to work all your life for the same factory or institution. Stability, promotion, vital needs (from guaranteed dormitory to a separate flat, awaited for years!) Standards of Collectivism, Employee Loyalty and Work Experience were essential to deserve peer respect and bonuses from the Big Brother.
But you can’t say “most people won’t move”!
Because they were massively encouraged, if not forced, to relocate. The Government was interested to mix nations and distribute professionals evenly. Here are but several paths that might be followed by parents and grandparents to my generation.
College graduates and skilled workers, as well as good managers might be sent to work to another Soviet republic.
Military men of the numerous career army were moved along with their commands together with their families. (Let alone faraway mandatory conscription service!)
Strong and brave men migrated for harder but better-paid work.
Young men and women migrated to build railroads or explore for natural resources. These occupations were in fashion as patriotic, romantic, and fit for a deserving personality.
Yes, the Iron Curtain was preventing our people from traveling abroad. But boy how they strived to! It was such a privilege to be permitted out, and such a cultural shock to see “This Is How People Should Live!”
Now Former Soviet people are keen to travel, often to study or work abroad. A significant part of Russian Brides is more world-travelled by their 20-30 than an average American by the retirement age.
You are right that, if a woman is not equipped for a foreign society, she would be dead scared to move.
And even if she is linguistical and skilled enough to feel “grown out of” her neighborhood, and is not going on her own as a tourist, student or employee, a normal girl would only rely on THE man she supposes to STAY with. Not the one she hasn’t known enough to trust (“what if he’s a jerk”)! Not the one she may get in conflict with if someone of the couple doesn’t like the other (“and I’m lost alone in the jungle”)!
Unless she is an Opportunist Filibuster.
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
Natalia,
Thanks for providing more details on this issue. The disdain and suspicion that I was refering to was exactly what you talked about in terms of a person being expected to work their whole life in a particular workplace or factory.
If they had a job history that showed otherwise on their official government employment records book then they would essentially be discredited for being a subpar “employee”.
You are right this was the majority reason behind the lack of free movement and the politics or control aspect was a minor but still significant issue in my mind.
Either way the system worked very well in discouraging free movement within the country and this is just another reason that added to the long term economic and political malaise of the system.
Overall this “stagnation” of free migration within the Soviet Union still carries it’s own momentum to this day. In my view this reason combined with economic expenses of relocating are primarily responsible for the majority of Russian Women remaining in the same city for most if not all of their lives. Again I believe this is changing because more opportunities for these women are presenting themselves for more freedom of choice concerning relationships and careers. And this is a positive thing that is long overdue.
GL
hi Y’ll
now here is my story
i was in russia for quite a long time. in poor industrial city.
there i met a lady who was divorced has a boy of seven , living with her mumy in a two room flat where 5 ppl are resident. she doesnt speak any turkish and only a few words of english but it was ok.
working for approx. 3000 (100usd, rent of the house was 2000 rubles) rubles per month. we have spent very nice days together (almost 3 weeks. she was poor but also was willing to pay. the ratio was almost 1 to 8 but that was already big amount of money for her.
now i am in turkey but we still regually speak on the phone. keeping friendship from a short romance & flirt.
vast majority of ladies in russia are poor, under very bad working conditions and treated like angels in hell.
anybody who have some money can look like a savior or so called hero. though the USA guy was a complete idiot. because nearly all russian ladies (just as anybody) would like to have better conditions but i personally believe that if they are fallen in love money will always be in the second place for them. being with their love having babies and raising a family will be the only concern. vast majority of them are very nice and caring ppl whom you can trust with your eyes shut.
by the way we also have the male versions of that kind in turkey in resort places who are trying to pick up ladies for sex, money and visa. but who can say any guy who is interested in a foreign lady is the same?!
to sum up;
if you are not man enough to sense what the real feeling is better not dare to have such a relation.
best regards
“being with their love having babies and raising a family will be the only concern.”
“vast majority of them are very nice and caring ppl whom you can trust with your eyes shut.”, Erdogan
Now compare for attitude …
“Turkish word for working girl is “Natasha”
“ask any Turkish men on the street what Russian women are like, they will immediately say that they are prostitutes.”
“Just tell your friends to be careful[??wtf] when/if they ever visit Turkey for a cheap swim and beach fun.”, turkish
Now the decoding …
Erdogan would do well with an International business, if not a Soviet girl.
From what I know about the primarily Muslim, yet, not fundamentalist Turkey, it would be much more sensible to do their searching in the heavily Muslim “Stans”—Uzbekistan, Kyrgyzstan and so on.
‘turkish’ screams sour grapes all over his incredibly horrible attitude. Probably perpetually deleted whenever he sends letters to Russian girls who know more about you and what living there would mean to their lives and happiness.
“Just tell your friends to be careful”? Is this a formal threat?
Tell me do you beat defenseless little girls? Is this part of your manly charm when you warn us to be careful?
I can only guess at the tortuous frustration of a Muslim man who has seen the spectacular beauty and fantasized about the legendary passion of many Soviet girls and yet knows that HE will never, ever, EVER naturally inspire this sexual passion in the best girls in the world. Not one time, not with one.
It must be even more frustratiing knowing that even the Turkish climate is so much more popular than you. You must almost feel invisible when you see tham having such a good time WITHOUT YOU. Again and again and again.
This is my response to you and your friends… My girl and I will always be safe. Even at the table directly across from you. It is my honour to protect her and to intercede on behalf of any Russian girl who would be attacked by pond scum who would think to attack even “Natasha”, for whatever reason. And this goes for anywhere at anytime.
Every such foreign land I go to, it is good practice to write a letter to the local Tourism minister, with a copy also sent to the local yahoo leader writing about our reluctance to visit (spend our money) in his country due to security concerns and people like you with viceral and open hatred.
We will both travel with our Canadian emblems where all can see. Russians are not naive about who hates them.
And by the way, I personally combine business with pleasure when I travel. I make it my habit to take more money out of a country than I spend while there. So, your cheap Turkish beaches, for us, will be paid for. Even better than free.
Best of luck finding happiness with your Turkish women though turkish. I see how happy they already make you.
While in Toronto I met some very charming Turks. I enjoyed their sense of humour.
About the guy and his money…
Never screw up special occasions like March 8 and birthdays, unless you want to go directly to the doghouse. Any reasonable level of gifting will not be taken as “an offer to purchase.”
A man needs to know how to test for love … not how to buy what cannot ever be bought.
Show me a girl sitting with Joe stupid solely because of his money, and I will show you a girl waiting for a real man to take her from him–regardless as to how much or little or much he has.
Why do I have to explain everything? lol
… gotta go. I hear some long haired, passionate blond girl ringing my phone.
“You are right, and you are right. – Rabi, it’s impossible! – You are right, too”.))
I don’t think Turkish was threatening. He was conveying the existing prejudice, which is owed to easy women who travel to “unwind” with “hot Southerners” for lack of local testosterone and passion, and to actual prostitutes visiting Turkey for earning or, mainly, told tales about cleaner work, or snatched, and sold into slavery. This makes a vast part of our women loathe Turkish men. Other women indeed think, “what am I going to do with Muslim culture”. Of course there are exceptions. On the one hand, a specific “Muslim-esque” type of female character occurs in the FSU. On the other hand, there are “international” men. Yesterday I was very surprized to know that our brilliant pop singer Ani Lorak, who recently became her own author and producer (!!), is seriously dating a Turkish guy. But the general picture is… lucky, lucky Erdogan.
Sincerely, Comrade Natalia
Natalia… Yes, to the going to get laid travels of some Russian girls. For those among them who are quite young, I don’t think that location stops them at home either.
If he was referring to being careful about the local perceptions due to the historical behaviour of some Russian girls in his country, then it can be seen that he is warning ahout seeking Turks for serious relationships.
The “who wants a ho”? syndrome. Only if she’s not seriously interesting to him.
And regarding this thread … “I’ll take his cash—even if he’s not seriously interesting to me(her).”
Then there is the “greedy [read selfish] man syndrome.
Many times I’ve heard comments from Westerners about Russian girls like “golddigger” applied to these girls who are simply seeking a traditional marriage, where he is to be the sole provider and she the homemaker. So, be careful not to paint yourself as a “greedy” man in your zeal to not be taken for a ride, to your ATM.
This frequent Western comment is very peculiar in light of our, “So what do you do for a living? [read, So, how much money do you have?] introductions, ever since I began to date Western girls.
More cultural misunderstanding, in cases of genuine interest, regarding Russian girls and “will you be able to support our family while I am your wholly dependent wife”
“What? She doesn’t work?”, the tool of the Cult of Feminazi.
There needs to be care taken not to paint what are the natural practical concerns of a TRADITIONAL Feminine FSU girl and a FSU scammer, with the same brush.
Always comes back to knowing how to know if she loves you or can.
Hola, finally we’re on the same page after clashing over “Poor Guy Good Girl Test” post. )
Suppose the decorous company agrees this memo is worth sharing around…
http://russianwomenspeak.wordpress.com/2007/02/20/more-golden-rules-for-advanced-first-dates-russian-or-ukrainian-women-to-western-particularly-american-men/
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
GL’s post is about men who don’t understand the dynamics of the money question when dealing with Russian girls.
Think of money at the beginning as salt added. The main course is you.
And if a man has concentrated on his money while almost entirely neglecting his manly arts and character during his lifetime; then, of course, he will want to lead with money to divert her attention away from his lack of confidence.
So, I think that the man in this story simply lacks confidence. He’s insecure….
Natalia, sometimes it’s difficult for a Russian girl to understand our bizarre Feminazi societies. Especially all the confusion over money.
Add to this, the gazillion warnings given about Russian scammers and this leads to a very confused man.
In the suspicion heaped onto Russian girls who even dare to speak about it, we seem to instantly forget the very first question asked to us here: “So what do you do?” [How much money do you have?]
Can you imagine, as a girl, getting this for your very “first” question: “So, do you enjoy sex?”
A tad offensive, yes?
Feminazi’s are in absolutely no position whatsoever to pass judgment on Russian girls who simply want to know if he can afford to create a stable family life.
The Payboy’s relationship based on leading with money fails and suddenly “all Russian women are interested in money.” What?
Well, excuse me, but the same damn thing probably happens to him here as well.
Our society also tends to divide the genders rather than uniting our lives together. This is often very true in money matters–divorce court notwithstanding.
The result is that we are often perceived as being selfish and not understanding the dynamics of money within the context of a Traditional relationship.
And this is very often true.
Some Western cultures are more segregated about money than others. And I’ve noticed that the men from those countries are more often called “selfish” foreign men than others.
Lead with you, establish emotional repore, continue towards love.
Here’s an interesting concept for a Payboy:
A man doesn’t even have the right to offer money until she begins to open her heart to him.
You read me right Payboy. You literally don’t have the right to throw money at her until her heart shows signs of opening.
Which is the claim to fame for scammers.
“Oh, Mr. Payboy, I know it’s only the third letter, but you are such an incredible man, I simply can’t stop myself from loving your wonderful self.” Of course they think Payboys are stupid. They’re Russian. So, what’s the mystery about real love?
Apparently quite the mystery to Mr. Payboy.
So, leading with money is seen as an outright attempt to purchase. She will let you know when you have the right.
Instead of seeing a scammer under every rock, feel the emotions. And if a man never knows how to know the heart of a girl, he will never get one. At least never passionately.
So, you feel you’re not fine enough to deserve such a fine girl?
Well, so CHANGE AND IMPROVE. Or don’t and live with your momma or be the barking dog of a Feminazi.
Wow, this man needs a REAL man to slap some sense into him! But I guess being raised in the United States of Femerica didn’t help…
[...] How Stupid Can this Man Be? [...]