As a matter of fact I believe your remaining time to get hooked up with a Russian lady is getting squeezed out.. I’m talking about the relative “openness” with which men in the past have been able to start a long distance courtship which led to marriage.
There are 3 thing major things that I see working against you.
ONE
You don’t think American women are starting to get a clue about the choices we have over here? Well how about this.. Some congresswoman out of Washington has submitted the Internet dating bill called PL109-162 which has just been unfortunately signed into law by the President. The gist of it is that you need to submit your police records for any past crimes or complaints against you to the woman you are interested in corresponding with and she must sign off on it before you are allowed to communicate.
George Orwell’s vision is alive and well and I only expect it to get worse on your side with more time. Just think about how romantic it is for some young lady who is required to sign off on form regarding your police record.
This sends a very scary and false message to her that most American men are crazed abusers which by the way the local state run media here is more then happy to emphasize with the horror stories that they air about exploited Russian wives.
At this point I expect that many girls over here would just say.. “To hell with this..” and walk away and take her chances in an environment where although the odds may be stacked against her at least she knows it well. A friend of mine once said, “There is no greater fear then the unknown”. I know this to be especially true with the women here and this law just feeds into that big time.
TWO
There is a controversial but popular lawmaker in Russia who last year was trying to pass a law prohibiting all foreign marriages by using the collapsing demographic (plus a big dose of nationalism) in this country as the primary justification for it. He wanted to strip any woman who married a foreigner of her Russian citizenship which would prevent her from ever coming back to this country again. Now thankfully his bill didn’t get very far and was rejected but that doesn’t mean that the undercurrent doesn’t exist to raise some other legal restriction sometime in the future.
Guys if a law like this passed you can kiss all of this goodbye because no Russian woman in her right mind would ever sacrifice her citizenship or more importantly her ability to travel back to see here family no matter what type of life she could have in the States or elsewhere. This bill was like a giant near miss asteroid just glazing the Earth’s outer atmosphere as far as I’m concerned.
THREE
Russia is getting lots of oil and gas money so therefore many places within the country are developing fast.. You should have enough of a clue to realize how rapidly this can change traditional attitudes and values especially among younger girls.
MTV is extremely popular here.. Madonna is idolized.. and we get all the same crap programming that you do over there. Sex in the City is syndicated with Russian speaking overdubs and it was one of the most popular shows in Russian TV history. Cosmopolitan magazine has been here for a few years now and as you can guess it also spews the same narcissistic and materialistic clap trap that has mentally “nourished” American women for what 50 years?
Are you guys starting to get the picture?
Good.. Now go get off your asses and start preparing for what you need to do..
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Exactly how much time is left?
Relax, Gentlemen.
Try to look at things with our eyes as you prove you can.
We have a proverb, “A Woman Loves With Warranty”… so, with that police record law, we finally give a GREAT SIGH OF RELIEF from that nagging fear of Knowing Nothing about the man behind the (screen, the sea, the table…)
Our fundamental modesty and No-Hurting attitude just don’t let us ask such things ourselves, nor is a romantizing man likely to bring up the issue… there are even no etiquette hints how to approach it!
This is what agencies are for: a neutral intermediary, taking over all the bad connotations and the blame for them, to spare a budding couple’s romance from what they are desperately needful, as well as justly obliged and rightful, to know…
Now the best news.
In the Former Soviet Union, with its totalitarian repressions, half-nation has been prisoners or prisoners’ relatives; and the Police, as well as the Government in general, has always been people’s adversary, rather than ally.
So there is a category of offenses absolutely amnestized by Russian women: TAX evasion & BUSINESSMAKING infringements, up to crimes (not cheating on business partners or poisoning customers, but against the State it’s OK, and even ecological infringements may well go overlooked).
We also often tolerate road accidents (for not much of habitual road discipline over here) – unless somebody got killed or injured through the driver’s fault.
Some turn a blind eye to other administrative offences, like petty breaches of order.
Other things… sorry, guys. Your brides should know all the rotten spots to make aware decisions.
Possibly it’s too extreme to make one turn inside out before saying hello, possibly his bride-to-be could overlook his past having developed strong feelings for them…
but please agree we don’t deserve deception, and spare the time of our fleeting youth, so scarce and therefore precious. Opposing this is, well, evil.
I agree it’s unjust to have no similar requirements for women. But there are regulations requiring a clear record for our national to get a foreign passport and visas to many countries, and many gentlemen don’t shun background checks.
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
How come it took almost 6 months for any comments to be posted here?
All good points, Natalia, on a personal level. But this isn’t just a “guy thing”, it’s an “American thing”. The IMBRA law turns the foundation of our Bill of Rights – Innocent until proven guilty – on its head.
Will this law prevent some tragedies? Maybe. And so would allowing warrantless searches at any time as police see fit, suspending habeas corpus, and so on.
I know political principles do, and should, mean less than being safe and free of fear, to a girl considering taking a huge leap into the unknown.
But still..
I just don’t understand.
A person is (or should be) fully aware of his police record. And he submits the information on himself to a girl he… well, not necessarily plans, but imagines a life of honest unity with. So, no warrantless searches.
What he has done, he has done. If he were innocent, he [well I say presumably] would haven’t had any penalties, or would have been absolved from prosecution.
If he has been convicted, it doesn’t mean he would do the same again. But do you have much trust for your once-divorced American woman, or for a girl who has been taken to police for alleged prostitution?
Wow, I got a cutoff from the Web first time I posted on this page (a brand-new cable by a respected provider, serving flawlessly!) and now my second comment flipped through…
I don’t understand.
A person is (or must be aware) of his own record. He recollects his case and informs the girl he is, well, not planning but imagining a life of honest unity with. What warrantless search?
Second, if he were innocent, he would have had no penalties, or have been rehabilitated.
What he has done, he has done. It doesn’t mean he would commit something again, but… do you have full credit for your once-divorced American woman? Or a girl who was once taken to police for alleged prostitution? Wouldn’t you prefer to know in case it has happened?
Good day to everyone!
I fully agree on all of the above.
But I think the ones who will be most impacted (adversely) will be our American brethren who met their love through marriage agencies. I believe this bill was passed and signed into law (IMBRA 2006) last January with 3 or 5 members in quorom and attendance in the Congress.:-( It is all about full dislosure of the American citizen to his/her would be prince/princess before the meeting can take place.
It goes the same manner too for fiance/fiancee’ intending to come to the US, on (K-1 visa) that he/she must secure a police record of every place/country he/she stayed (statute of limitation 18 years).
I think marriage is a life long commitment (sorry players) and both parties should have the right to know of the others. Informed decisions my friends really sort out some of the issues with heart over head.
My best to all!
Amorcito
(What’s wrong with the “Matrix”? Can’t post it!)
A person is (or must be aware) of his own record. He recollects his case and informs the girl he is, well, not planning but imagining a life of honest unity with. What warrantless search?..
Second, if he were innocent, he would have had no penalties, or have been rehabilitated.
What he has done, he has done. It doesn’t mean he would commit something again, but… do you have full credit for that notorious once-divorced AmW? Or a girl who was once detained for alleged hooking? Wouldn’t you prefer to know this in case it has happened?
Sinc., N.
> What warrantless search?
You know, — the one that will be slipped into the next bill to pass Congress in the middle of the night.
I’m not sure I could really explain the distrust and paranoia Americans have toward government – any government. Washington, Jefferson, Madison, and Adams might be better men to consult on that…
Again – I am NOT arguing against full disclosure of the past or protecting people from abuse and deception. Everyone has a right to check out another person in a case like this, and I would have no problem with a woman asking me for a background check. (In fact, I’ve already had one, as I work in a security-related field.) I would understand completely, and I’d be glad of the opportunity to put her fears to rest. Though I understand that she probably never would ask.
I just have a problem with my government intruding into the personal decisions of me and those I care about, on the presumption that I’m probably a miscreant if I want to marry a foreign woman. The law is vague and ill-conceived, based on phony/exaggerated statistics and inflammatory language from the feminist organization that drew it up and bullied spineless politicians into signing it.
I’m going to provide a link to the site of this organization and some comments on their bias, when I have some time. As well as some suggestions for a much better way that this assurance could be accomplished without getting the nanny state involved.
As far as background checks etc. for getting a visa to immigrate, that’s immigration policy. I doubt any country in the world would allow me to immigrate without similar requirements (if they allowed me to immigrate at all.) So no double standard there.
Well, with all my Post-Soviet background, I’m not advocating IMBRA, nor totalitarian control, – I just want to say that your officials have unwantedly given you and us a mighty tool to optimistically override its goals! )) I even hear my fellow-women say, “I’ll first watch American men, – with all the imperfections of this nation, there’s an initial disclosure law, I wish there were same safeguards with other countries!”
Re “double standards”, my message was to show that men just don’t stay bare unaware of our women’s background, which undergoes a check first time she ever gets a foreign passport and other docs for any traveling in her regular life, leave alone emigration.
The only trouble is that this virgin clear paper, all the more in our corrupt system, is no guarantee against “socialized prostitution”, and various scams no one in the Authorities may even be aware of.
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
Guys keep in mind that anytime someone wants to open up borders.. there is always some entrenched players that will do anything to keep it closed down.
During the 1930′s the San Francisco Ferry Boat Operators worked like the Mafia in doing everything they could to make sure that the Golden Gate Bridge would not be built.
Keep this in mind when you read any hostile comments from Western Women or if you hear of any more pressure to create new legal restrictions to establish these types of relationships.
Constant Vigilance Gentlemen.. Constant Vigilance..
Sorry Natalia, my comment about double standards was really a response to Amorcito – he said (I think) that if a foreign national needs a background check to immigrate to the US, how is this different? But I think that’s apples and oranges – immigration requirements vs. restrictions on citizens marrying whom they please.
BTW, I just remembered an article I read, by an American journalist who was curious about what it would take for an American to immigrate alone to other countries. He called embassy after embassy, and mostly he got “you can’t” in one form or another. The Japanese response was the most interesting – total mystification that the question was being asked. They didn’t get it at all. When he finally made them understand, they said “Why would we want to allow you to live here?”
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